I smile. “Then give me a reason to stay.” I roll onto my side and Sean pulls us together. My heart pounds harder. I can feel every curve of his ripped body against me.
Sean lowers his head and presses his lips to my neck. I shiver and hold my breath. “I shouldn’t.” He kisses my neck again. His lips slip over my skin, and his tongue evokes a slew of sensations that shoot through my body.
“Sean,” I moan his name and push him away. “We can’t…”
But Sean doesn’t stay away. Instead, he comes on stronger with delicious, delicate touches that make me close my eyes and beg for more. Then, he abruptly stops. “Alright, we can stop.” He’s grinning at me. Sean’s made me all hot and bothered and then stopped.
I shove him and laugh, “You suck.”
“I tried, but you said no.” He gives me a crooked grin and sits up. He still has that rumpled shirt on with the front hanging open. Sean kicks the covers off and stands.
“How’s your leg?”
“Better. Everything is better today.” Sean turns back to the bed and says, “Pretend with me for a while?” He holds out his hand for me, but I don’t take it.
“What do you mean?”
“We can’t have a relationship because of your job and because of—well, me and my preferences—but we can pretend for a moment, for a shower, that we’re normal people. I can help you get dressed. Help you scrub off in the shower, you know, normal things that normal people do.” Sean looks hopeful. His voice is so soft and sweet.
“You want me to take a shower with you?” He nods. “Because it’s not a violation of Black’s contract and because it’s not that weird kind of sex you like?”
He pulls me to his feet. “Because we’re both dirty and need to get dressed. Stop overthinking it. If the idea of rubbing soap over my stomach appeals to you, then follow me. If you’d rather get dressed by yourself, then wait your turn. I won’t be long.” He drops my hand and walks across the room and disappears into the bathroom.
My gaze follows after him. I want to go. My fingertips are actually tingling, thinking about touching him, but it’s such a stupid idea. I shouldn’t. Irritation shoots through me.
I storm across the room and barge in, saying, “You can’t say things like that and then—” The words die in my mouth. Sean is half nak*d and peeling off his pants. My eyes run over his body, over the bruises and cuts that are there because of me. “You don’t play fair,” I choke out.
Sean grins. “Neither do you.” He walks over to me and slips his hands around my waist. He tugs my h*ps so they line up against his nak*d body. “Are you going to join me or watch?”
My face flames red. Watch? I can’t watch! What kind of person watches. Holy crap. I mill it over and realize that I’d like to watch him—no, love to watch him and his nak*d body in the shower. The thought jars me. I try to pull away, but he holds me tighter.
Sean grins, realizing what he did. “Ah, so you have a little bit of a voyeur thing going on?”
“No,” I gasp, way too flushed. “I do not.”
Sean looks down at my chest and then back at my face. “Mmm. Too bad. I think that’s beyond sexy.” My eyes dart anywhere and everywhere, trying to avoid his gaze. “You look a little bit guilty for someone who’s telling the truth.” The only thing he’s wearing is a sexy smirk. I can see it out of the corner of my eye as he teases me.
My heart is pounding so fast inside my chest that it’s going to explode. I glance at his shoulder, to avoid his eyes. “Guilt? This isn’t guilt.”
Sean tilts my chin up and our eyes meet. The floor of my stomach drops and I’m in a free fall. “Then what is it?”
I don’t answer. I can’t answer. I have no idea what types of sexual things I like or what I’d do. Up until now, I’ve done what Sean wanted. If I liked it, bonus, but I’ve never noticed something like this. I feel exposed and want to shy away, but Sean won’t let me. We stare at each other for too long, letting the silence build. His eyes drift to my lips, but he doesn’t move or release me.
I feel like I’m breathing too much. I feel like I’m drowning, but I don’t want to come up for air. Sean inches closer to my lips. He hesitates there for a moment, before leaning in and taking my bottom lip between his teeth. He nips me and then drops his hands to my hips. I suck in a startled breath and allow him to move me backwards.
Sean sits me down on a little bench in front of a mirror. He looks me in the eye before he does it. Neither of us speaks. Sean’s finger finds the button on my jeans. He undoes the zipper and tugs them down and pulls them off. I’m sitting in front of him in a tee shirt and panties.
Sean steps away and walks to the shower. It’s directly across from me. He turns it on. Before stepping inside, he says, “Fingers between your legs, Miss Smith. Do what comes naturally. I’ll leave the door open so you can see whatever entices you.”
It feels like someone threw a bucket of ice water on me. I dart upright in the seat, “Sean, I can’t—”
But he doesn’t listen. “Yes, you can. And I think you’ll like it, and I sure as hell know that I will.” Then, Sean winks at me and steps into the shower.
What the hell does that mean? He really wants to watch me give myself a good time while watching his nak*d body in the shower? I shouldn’t have thought about him and his slick skin. As soon as I do, I glance up at him and see Sean under the shower with water dripping off those toned muscles. I suck my lower lip into my mouth. I’m breathing too hard, but I can’t look away. I don’t want to look away.
Sean acts like I’m not there. He rubs his hands over his body, moving soap suds around before rinsing them away. After a moment, I realize that I’m no longer thinking. I’m watching. If there was a picture of a person under voyeur in Wikipedia, it’d be me, right now, with my jaw hanging open.
Holy hell, he’s so hot. The place between my thighs is tingling uncomfortably. I think about putting my hand there, but I can’t. Something holds me back.
Sean stretches and lets the water roll down his back. His arms are over his head with his hands behind his back. My eyes wander over every muscle, every perfect rise and fall of flesh. I think about feeling his skin, about running my tongue over his perfect stomach. I settle on the bench seat, leaning back against the wall, and glance at my hand. He wanted me to.
I glance back up at Sean, but he doesn’t look over at me. I’m breathing so hard. It’s like Sean teased the hell out of me, but he hasn’t even touched me. My fingers twitch on my lap as the V at the top of my thighs demands attention. I’m caught in the middle. I want to, but I don’t. My eyes remain fixed on Sean’s body and more dirty thoughts race through my mind – of touching, licking, and tasting.
Any rationality I had left vacates my mind. I’m not thinking anymore. My body is all tingles and urges. I want to cross the room, walk into the shower, and throw Sean against the wall. I want to press my bare br**sts into him and feel my hard n**ples slide down his chest.
I stare at the curve of Sean’s ass, unblinking. It’s so perfect. I think about having Sean on top of me, pushing in and out, while I hold onto that perfect ass and dig my nails into his skin. It pulls vivid memories forward from the times we’ve been together, of the way Sean felt so hard and sharp every time he thrust into me.
When Sean turns to face the stream of water again, my gaze soaks in his perfect erection. My breath catches in my throat. I stare at him, watching him, and can’t stand it anymore. My hand dips below the waistband of my panties, and over my warm skin. I press my fingers between my legs and into the slick folds of skin. My knees separate as I stroke myself, while watching Sean. His hands move over his body as the water pours off him in sheets. His eyes are closed as he tips his head back. Slowly, he moves his hand toward his long shaft and strokes. Sean’s lips part as he does it again and again.
I’ve stopped wondering what’s wrong with me, and act on my feelings. My h*ps thrust into my hand as I think about taking Sean’s hard length in my mouth and sucking. My movements become harder and faster. I want to throw my head back, but I don’t want to look away. I want to see Sean’s face when he comes.
My h*ps slam into my hand as I rock myself higher and higher. Sean’s body moves faster and faster. With every thrust into his hand, Sean’s butt cheeks clench and all I can think about it biting him there. I want my tongue on his body. I want his dick in my mouth, and his hands on my br**sts. My body is coiled so tight. I’m so hot. The throbbing starts and I can feel myself losing control. I think I can hold it together, but then Sean moans and thrusts hard and slow into his hand. I watch him come and see the ecstasy play out on his beautiful face.
I lose it. My head tips back and my h*ps buck. My fingers move faster, rubbing harder, and I shatter. Waves of ecstasy unfold inside of me. I thrust my chest higher as I hold my hand tightly between my legs. Each delicious pulse that fills my body makes me feel more sated. I stay like that for a moment, enjoying the aftershocks that are still shooting through me.
My eyelids feel heavy, but I manage to open them. When I do, Sean is standing in front of me with a wicked grin on his face. The shower is still running behind him. I didn’t hear him walk over. My fingers are still inside of me with my legs spread wide open. I’m slightly horrified, but all I can do is blink.
He leans in close and whispers in my ear, “That was the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen. May I?”
I suck in air. All those wicked thoughts come rushing back. I don’t know what he wants to do, but I nod anyway. Sean pulls my hand away and raises it to his lips. He sucks each finger before lowering his hand and dipping it into my panties. I watch him as he spreads my lower lips with his fingers and strokes me. I’m so sensitive that I gasp. I throw my head back and buck my h*ps at his touch. His fingers slip inside of me and I moan.
Sean sits next to me on the bench. I remain leaning back with my elbows on the make-up counter behind me. I should feel silly, sitting like this with my legs spread wide and next to this beautiful, nak*d, man, but I don’t. I like it. I enjoy the sensations that shoot through me and refuse to think about anything else. Sean’s hand teases me until I beg for release. He torments me for another moment and then gives me what I want. I cry out, saying his name, as I throb around his fingers. I feel Sean’s eyes on my face, watching me as I cli**x. I feel his greedy gaze and know it’s the same one I had when I was watching him a few moments ago.
When my breathing resumes a normal pace, I open my eyes. Sean’s fingers are still inside me. He smiles and pulls his fingers out one by one, and strokes me as he pulls his hand away. The response is instant. I gasp and throw my head back. Random coils of pleasure shoot through me, pulsing softly.
My head droops back and I stare at the ceiling. Sean takes my face with one hand, holding my cheeks, and makes me look at him. His other hand appears and he moves his fingers over the seam of my lips. They’re damp, from me. My lips part and he pushes a finger in, watching me intently. I suck his finger, licking it. He does it twice more before leaning in and pressing a light kiss to my mouth.