Because that’s what I want for us. I want for us to live.”
How did he always know the right thing to say? I threw my arms around his neck and held him. Tears burned at the back of my eyes. I hated that he knew me well enough to know what he was basically asking me to give up. I loved that he was willing to wait for me. And I hated myself even more that I was forcing him to, when I knew my heart was already his for the taking.
Chapter Twenty-six
Demetri
I held her shaking body for a few minutes. So many times I opened my mouth to tell her the truth. To tell her all about Brady. It would be so easy to swoop in and explain to her that she was hugging the prince, that he wasn’t dead in the ground. Brady wasn’t who she thought he was, but again it wasn’t my place.
Truthfully, I hadn’t been able to see her for very long these past few days. I didn’t want to. It hurt too damn bad to look into her innocent and hopeful eyes and keep the dirtiness of what Brady did away from her. Not that Holly was innocent, but as a guy, I knew the type of power trip Brady must have been feeling. Shit, up until last year I’d lived that life.
Adding the whole Seaside show to the mix was enough to put me into a catatonic state of stress. I swear I stared at my wall for ten whole minutes doing nothing but breathing in and out and trying to calm myself down. The stress was getting to me. I had the taffy wrappers to prove it.
But when she texted me today. Damn. I couldn’t say no.
Everything felt better in her arms. Which was crazy. We’d known each other for a little over a month, and I was ready to do anything for her. I knew those type of feelings were possible. People always talk about love at first sight. I’d never believed in it. Alec did though, and so did Nat. But me, never.
And now, with Alyssa in my arms. Shit, I wanted to shout it up and down the boardwalk that I was in love with this girl.
“Crap!” Alyssa pulled out of my embrace. Oh no. Her face looked ashen. “Your birthday?”
I exhaled in relief. “About that…”
“Demetri!” She swatted me on the shoulder. “Is it soon? You said Nat gave you that shirt for your birthday!”
“This weekend. Friday. Alec and Nat are throwing me a huge party. I want you to come.” I swallowed the dryness in my throat. “Be my date?” My palms began to sweat. Geez, you’d think I never asked a girl out before.
Alyssa’s eyes lit up and then she frowned. “Don’t we have group on Friday?”
“After group. I figured we could meet at your house for group and then I could drive you to my house for the party.”
“And when were you going to tell me about all of this?”
“Today.” Okay, so I was lying. I meant to tell her yesterday but still hadn’t had the balls to call her and see her face to face after everything that went down with Holly.
“Short notice, Demetri. How am I going to have time to shop for something to wear?”
“Just go to Victoria Secret.” I shrugged. “I’m sure they can help you out.”
“So it’s a nak*d party then?” Her little hand pressed against my chest and then ran down until she hooked her finger into the loop of my jeans pulling me closer against her. Holy hell, a man could die happy this way.
“Naked parties are the only way to go…” What the hell was she doing? Her hand moved to my stomach and began rubbing just above my briefs. Her nails lightly scratched, and I honestly thought I was going to fall off the edge of the boardwalk. I swayed toward her and closed my eyes.
“I don’t know if I like that you’ve been to nak*d parties.”
She purred, her wicked little hand still making me crazy.
“I don’t…” Damn, what was I going to say? “I mean, I…”
Holy. Hell. Her thumb rubbed across my hip bone, and I jerked toward her on instinct.
“Demetri…” Her lips found mine. I was so hot for her I wanted to toss her over the ledge and peel off her clothes one by one, watching as the wind ran across her creamy skin and…”
“…ice cream.”
“Ice cream?” I repeated slowly coming out of my daydream.
What about ice cream? Wait, where did her hand go? Why was I still so damn turned on?
“Let’s go get ice cream, and you can tell me all about your party.” She winked and stood in front of me. If she expected me to walk around right now she had another think coming. A minute ago I didn’t even know what my name was. I glared. She tilted her head and winked. She knew exactly what she was doing that little… oh, but what a way to go.
“I need a minute.”
“Oh?” She tilted her head innocently.
I felt my nostrils flare. “One, two, three…”
“Wait, why are you counting?” She backed up slowly.
“Four, five, six…”
“Demetri…” She giggled and then snorted.
I stretched my arms above my head and yawned. “Seven, eight, nine…”
Her eyes widened.
“Ten.” I lunged for her little body and caught her just as she was turning to run. She kicked and screamed, but it was like a tiny ant fighting a bear. I effortlessly carried her toward the ocean.
“Put me down!”
“Nope! I need to cool off…” I laughed as she began screaming at me and pounding her tiny fists onto my back.
“Demetri Daniels!”
“Scream it again, sweetheart, only makes me need the ice cold water more.”
She squirmed against me.
“Right.” I snorted and slapped her ass. “Because that helps.”
“Demetri!”
“Alyssa!” I yelled and then walked into the ocean with her in my arms. When the water reached my knees I was sufficiently cooled off. And then her eyes met mine and a different kind of heat spread through my body. One I didn’t want to cool off. One I wanted to remember for the rest of my life. I set her down on her feet. The waves crashed against our legs, but I didn’t feel cold.
“I more than like you,” I whispered as I brushed the hair whipping against her cheek from the wind.
She closed her eyes and sighed against my hand as it cupped her cheek. “I more than like you too, which is what makes this so hard.”
My stomach dropped. And the next thing I knew she pushed me, causing my balance to falter just slightly, which would have been fine if a wave hadn’t chosen that exact moment to crash right next to us.
Okay, now I was cold.
“One.” I shouted as I jumped out of the chilling water.
She squealed. “Oh no, Demetri Daniels is counting again.
Two!” She joined in mocking me. She threw her head back and laughed.
This time I didn’t even make it to three. I just tackled her against the sand as the icy water crashed over us.
Chapter Twenty-seven
Alyssa
I couldn’t stop smiling. The hurt that was ever-present, the memorial I kept with me was slowly fading and although I was sad, I felt like it was time. And I had Demetri to thank for it. He made me want to smile. He made me feel like it was okay to be happy.
I twirled in front of the mirror. In a moment of panic I’d texted Holly for help on what to wear for the party. She’d come to my rescue as all girls should when another girl has a fashion crisis, and I was again reminded how much I missed having girlfriends.
“It looks great,” Holly said from my bed. She’d asked if she could come over early and get ready. Apparently Demetri invited the entire group to his party, which was kind of awesome of him.
Could the guy do any wrong? I couldn’t match his personality now with the rumors floating around about him. I’d had a weak moment and searched the Internet at Mom and Dad’s store only to find tons of things I’d rather have not known. It was obvious he had a past, but it wasn’t my business. Besides, his hands were sweating when he asked me to be his date, which meant he was still human, and he was all mine.
“Thanks, Holly.” I walked over the bed and sat. My dress crunched a bit. It was a strapless baby doll style dress. It was black and silver with pieces of hanging material across the bodice making it look kind of grunge and trendy. My heels were red. All in all, it wasn’t something I would normally pick out for myself, but Nat insisted. She had it overnighted just in case it wasn’t the right size, and I needed to get it altered.
It fit perfect, and I felt really confident in it. I even let Holly do some of my makeup. I hoped Demetri would feel proud to have me on his arm.
Holly played with the fringe on her pale pink skirt. She wasn’t talking much.
“Are you feeling okay?” I asked, suddenly concerned when tears welled in her eyes.
She bit her lip and nodded. Strands of her chunky blond- and brown-highlighted hair fell over her eye. “I’m fine, just feeling kind of… off. It’s probably nerves about the party.”
Just then the doorbell rang. “Come on.” I grabbed her hand.
“We’ve gotta get through group first!”
I almost tripped down the stairs. It had been a while since I wore heels. Dad glanced at me just as he reached for the door. His mouth dropped open, he shook his head no a few times and then walked off in a daze.
“I think I just put him in shock,” I said to Holly.
She laughed. “Imagine what it will do to Demetri.”
“That’s probably my dad’s problem — he was imagining what Demetri would do.” He was probably going to complain to my mom later about my dress. But I imagined her hugging me more than reprimanding me.
I opened the door and came face to face with Sam.
“Hey!” I gave him a hug. Geez, if I didn’t stop smiling people were going to think I was on drugs.
“Um, hi.” His eyes took in my dress and then his smile widened. “You look great, Alyssa. Demetri’s going to have a stroke.”
I felt my cheeks heat with embarrassment as I looked away from Sam.
“Can… um…” Sam looked passed me to Holly and then grabbed my arm. “Can we go somewhere and talk really quick?”
“Sure.” I shrugged. “Holly, can you let everyone in?”
“Sure thing.” She saluted as I led Sam away from the door and upstairs to my room.
Once we were inside I closed the door. “What’s up, Sam?”
“I can’t do this.” Sam paced in front of me.
“Do what?” My stomach dropped when I saw his eyes well with tears.
“Damn, I just can’t do it anymore, Alyssa. It’s killing me.
You have no idea! I thought I was protecting you! That’s all I’ve ever done is protect you! Make him into a damn martyr and wait for you to admit it was me you liked, not him. Damn, I knew you loved him. I just wanted you to love me too. But in the end I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t do it. Damn regrets.”
I’d never heard Sam curse. Not once. Was he high? “Sam, what are you talking about?”
“Six years,” he whispered hoarsely. “Six years I’ve been in love with you. The last year you spent with Brady was the hardest.
I mean, he was my little brother. I couldn’t exactly move in on his girlfriend, and then when everything happened, my feelings just faded. I mean, I loved you, but you weren’t you anymore. You know what I mean? The girl I fell in love with died right along with my brother. And it was too damn painful to be around you, because your smile was gone and it was his fault. All his fault. He took his heart with you when he died and I was so afraid you’d never get it back.”