She shook her head, and this time I could see the expression in her eyes read miserable. I drug her to my chest and hugged her, wishing we were inside and without the fifteen layers of fabric, down, and feathers between us.
"I'm glad you said something, took the initiative. If you hadn't then I'd never have known."
"You liked it, right?" she asked quietly.
"Yeah, almost too much."
"Why?"
"Because all I'll be able to think of for the rest of my life is you sitting there on your knees, your palms up. In fact, I think you'll have to keep your neck covered, because if I see it bent down, I'm going to get hard. That's going to be tough for me in everyday activities."
This made her laugh as I'd hoped. "Where'd you get the idea, though?"
"In a book," she admitted. "Or books."
"Like a sex book?” I couldn’t really see Grace sitting in the Central College library looking through books on sex. What section would that be in anyway? Psychology?
"No," she huffed, "like a romance book."
"Wait, there are books out there with that kind of sex in them?"
"Yes."
"Do you fantasize about the other guys in the story?"
"No, I fantasize about you and me doing the stuff in the story."
"You have more fantasies?" She'd said fantasies. Plural. I was getting dizzy with excitement and had to rein myself before I abandoned my goal here and just ran back to the house with Grace in my arms.
"How do you think I spent all those years in between letters?"
"Like how many fantasies?"
"You have no idea."
Maybe not, but before the end of our mini vacation, I'd be applying every ounce of persuasion I had in me to learn as many as I could.
“We didn’t use a condom the other night,” I told her.
“I know,” she said. “Lana and I went to the health center and got a pill.”
“Thanks for taking care of that.” I rubbed her puffy arms and wondered if she could sense my mounting nervousness. “But I’d have been okay if you hadn’t done anything.”
“Really?” She cocked her head to the side in surprise. “You think we’re ready for that?”
“Maybe not, but I know that the day you have my kid, Grace, will be one of the best days of my life,” I confessed. Dropping to one knee, I pulled out the box. “If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day so I never have to spend a moment without you. Will you marry me?”
Grace gasped and her mouth formed a perfect oval. Then she sprung into my arms and pressed soft kisses over every inch of my face. My smile was so large I figured they could see it from Michigan.
“Is that a yes?”
“You proposed to me while quoting Winnie the Pooh?” She laughed, but there were tears in her eyes. “I couldn’t say no to those lines.”
I set Grace on my knee and popped the box open. Inside the white satin nestled a simple two-carat, round, brilliant-cut diamond in a platinum setting. Plucking it out with shaking fingers, I slid the ring onto Grace’s left hand. “We’re forever now.”
“As if I was going to let you go,” she whispered. I had to kiss her then, and I didn’t want to stop. I framed her cold cheeks between my hands and pressed my lips against hers, softly at first and then, because we couldn't touch each other without the fire of desire flaming bright, our kisses became urgent and frenzied until she wisely broke the kiss before I threw her down and gave the entire shoreline a real show.
“I love you, Noah Jackson, just the way you are.”
“I love you too, Grace. They aren’t just lines, you know. Someone’s just better at writing out my feelings than I am.”
“No personal vows then?” Grace ribbed me.
“I’m a traditional kind of guy.” I picked her up and carried her toward the house. “Besides, I know now how much you like the word ‘obey.’”
“In the bedroom, Noah,” Grace cried thumping me on the back. I laughed loudly and ran faster. In the bedroom for sure.
Grace
NOAH SPENT THE REST OF the day working out and watching tape. This upcoming fight was so important to him, and I'd promised him plenty of uninterrupted time to train and study his opponent. Thankfully, we had a first-rate work out facility in the basement that had been kitted out by Josh.
His trainer, Paulie, had apparently been furious when Noah told him what he was planning to do. I hadn't heard the first confrontation, which Noah had had down at the gym, but I heard several subsequent ones on the phone. Paulie wanted Noah to quit everything and just train, but Noah was adamant that he'd finish school. But the yogurt shop that Noah had bought, well, that was something both Paulie and I agreed was an unnecessary distraction.
I'd enlisted Lana for some help, and quietly we'd found Noah a manager. He was a young man who'd come from a bad situation but was eager to work. I suggested Noah hire him, and now he's a part-time manager. Well, that's the title Lana and I made for him. Noah's ability to delegate was a work in progress.
It's hard to figure out how Noah can't see how controlling he is. Not having had sex before Noah made me insanely curious, and now I was able to try out basically anything I'd ever fantasized about with a man who could carry it out. But he seemed awkward at first last night, and no matter how much we'd both been swept away by the experience, I couldn't help but lie there wondering if I had revealed something that he wouldn’t like.
In some ways, despite the fact we'd written to each other for four years, our relationship was so new that we'd barely had time to really settle in and achieve the comfort most couples had.
I wished I could tell Noah that I just wanted to be with him and that all the other stuff he thought was so necessary to my happiness was unnecessary—and that he would listen to me. So long as we were together, that was all that truly mattered.
“Joshie!” Lana’s cry of greeting had me leaping from my chair in the sunroom where I’d been reading those books that contained a fount of ideas for Noah and me.
“Josh!” I ran to kitchen where Josh had dropped his bag and was hugging Lana. I jumped on top of them both, and we shared a Sullivan family embrace. Josh kissed the top of my head.
“How’s it going, baby sis?”
“Better that you’re here.”
“Everything’s better when I’m around,” Josh jokingly bragged. “What’s this?” He picked up my hand. “I wasn’t even asked about this!” Josh looked a bit put out, but I think he was joking. I hoped he was joking.
“Just happened this morning,” I replied. My face was aching from the nonstop smile on my face.
Josh took in my smile and gave me another hug. “You happy then?”
“I am so happy,” I whispered and squeezed him back. With a final hug, Josh let me go.
“Daniel, you’re looking spry. How’s your family?” Josh gave Daniel a hug too, picking him up off the ground by half an inch. Daniel softened slightly and allowed himself one pat of Josh’s back.
“Very well, thank you for asking, Joshua,” Daniel responded, tugging a little on the bottom of his suit jacket, which had gotten slightly rumpled from Josh’s vigorous welcome.
Josh grabbed his bag and headed for his room with Lana and me trailing behind. We met Noah coming down the stairs. He must’ve heard the commotion. This was Noah and Josh’s first meeting. My breath caught as the two alpha males eyed each other, but my brother was one for making friends and not enemies. He charged up the rest of the stairs and grabbed Noah’s hand, pulling it close to him, and then thumped him on the back.
“So you joining the circus here?” Josh asked. He let Noah go and proceeded down the hall to his bedroom. We followed him like baby ducklings, Noah in the lead.
“As long as Grace is willing to suffer my presence, I’m here,” Noah replied.
I let out the breath I didn’t realize I was holding. Josh’s big grin broke out, and he patted Noah again on the back. “Good man. Grace’s got a good head on her shoulders, but you know, you hurt her, and I’m gonna have to take you down. Doesn’t matter that you fight professionally.” Josh threw his gear onto two of the gaming chairs that sat in front of a plasma television with several consoles attached to it.
“Oh God, Josh,” I groaned and covered my hand.
Unoffended, Josh just shrugged and Lana said, “You better make the same threats when I bring someone home.”
“No worries, cuz, I’ll beat down anyone that hurts my girls.” Josh gestured to the second chair. “Sit, Noah, and let’s see how good you are at running over people in Grand Theft Auto.”
Noah sat down. “I completely agree. You should end me if I hurt Grace.”
Not taking his eyes off the screen, Josh replied, “Sounds like you bagged a stand-up guy, Grace.”
“I lured him to shore with promises of steak and Xbox games,” I responded dryly.
“Works for me,” Josh said. He rubbed his belly. “You got some of that steak left over?”
Lana slid off Josh’s bed. “Come on, Grace. Let the boys have their bonding time.” We were heading out when Lana called back, “Don’t forget about the Stinson party.”
“Not going,” Josh yelled back.
“I heard that Bethany and Elizabeth Walsh will be there,” Lana said.
“We’ll be ready,” called Josh. As we were leaving, I heard Josh explain to Noah. “Twins. Dumb, busty twins.”
“Gotcha,” Noah said.
After closing the door behind us, I said, “I wasn’t going to go to the Stinson party. Noah needs his sleep.”
“You guys can’t f**k all the time,” Lana replied.
My cheeks felt hot. “Th-that’s not why I thought we should stay home.” I stammered. I mean, of course I wanted to have sex again. Just imagining Noah’s low voice commanding me to do things made me wet between my legs.
“That good, huh?” Lana eyed me speculatively. I had the urge to cover myself so that I could hide any visible signs of arousal.
“Yes,” I admitted. “So good.”
Lana made a face. “I’m pretty jealous, so don’t rub it in, okay? I need you to hang with me at the Stinson party. I think some of those biddies know that Peter cheated on me.”
“Okay, honey, I’m there for you.” I hugged Lana, feeling the frailness of her body against my plusher one. All my attention had been focused on Noah of late, and I’d neglected my friendship with Lana. One party wasn't going to hurt.
FOUR
Noah
I SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN THERE. I should have been sleeping, training, looking at tape. I should’ve been anywhere but at the house of some rich kid where the guys were wearing thousand-dollar shoes and the women were wearing cocktail dresses with sequins, and I felt like I was in an episode of Mad Men. Of course, I’d be serving.
This was a holiday party, and I guess people who weren’t me liked to dress up. I tended to avoid all formal events if possible, like the Marine Corps ball. I'd rather put my nuts in a freezer.