“You’ve been waiting for me,” he said in a gruff, possessive voice. “I don’t deserve you, Mara, but I need you.”
His tortured look, the emotion in his voice made Mara’s heart ache. This was a part of Jared Sinclair that she knew he never revealed, yet he trusted her with his vulnerability. The one woman he’d loved had thrown his trust aside and stomped on it, and then she’d died, leaving Jared empty, nothing inside him except guilt and grief. “I need you, too.” She sighed softly, knowing she’d just given Jared Sinclair her heart. She’d been fooling herself to think that she could even fight it. From the moment he’d walked into her shop, Jared had been different from every other man she’d ever known, her attraction to him instantaneous. Before, she’d been able to call it lust, a balm for the loneliness she’d felt since her mother’s death. But he was more than that, and she knew it. Beneath his I-don’t-give-a-shit facade was the heart of a sensitive, generous man. An incredible, exceptional man who’d sacrificed so much for others, including his self-worth and belief in himself.
“If you need me, take me then. Take everything you want.” He wrapped his arms around her and lifted her on top of him so she was straddling him.
“I thought you didn’t want it this way,” she squeaked.
“Oh, I want it any way you’ll give it to me, but you can control it, take as much of me as you’re comfortable with. Condom is in my pocket.”
“I asked Sarah to start me on birth control when I went to her office for a checkup,” she told him, feeling suddenly shy. Sarah Baxter, soon-to-be Sarah Sinclair, was officially her physician now. She’d been using Sarah for follow-up care on her injured ankle, and she’d be using her for everything from now on. Mara had asked Sarah to put her on birth control. Maybe she always subconsciously knew that what had happened with Jared was going to happen again. Pragmatically, she’d told herself it was just a precaution, but her heart knew that she and Jared would never stay away from each other if they were working together. Yes, there were other reasons to use the condom, but she wanted him to know that she trusted him. “It was exactly the right time. I’m covered, and I’m clean.”
Jared’s eyes shot to her face, astonished. “You trust me? Granted, my female count isn’t as big as it’s reputed to be, but I’ve fucked a lot of women, Mara. I won’t lie to you about that. But I’ve never had sex unprotected, and I’m free from any diseases. I haven’t been with anyone but you since I was last checked out.”
She nodded slowly. “I trust you. You’ve never given me any reason not to. Just promise me that if you decide to be with somebody else, you’ll tell me.”
His eyes grew dark and he sat up with lightning-fast movements, wrapping his arms around her waist. “There won’t be anyone else. Ever.” Jared’s voice was guttural and deep as he buried his face in her hair.
Mara told herself not to believe what he was saying. Someday there would obviously be other women. He wasn’t staying here forever, and they were in a moment of passion. Nevertheless, her heart starting racing from his fervent declaration, wanting so desperately to believe it was true. Gut instinct told her she’d never be with anyone like Jared again. “Then fuck me, Jared. Now. Please.” She’d worry about changes in their relationship when that time came. Nothing in life was guaranteed. For now, this was all about them, and all about Jared healing from some wounds so deep that they hadn’t mended with the passage of time.
His hands moved possessively down her back and cupped her ass, repositioning her to accept his cock. “You need to let me know if I hurt you.”
“You won’t.” Mara gasped as he filled her, but she was still so hot and wet from her climax that he entered her naturally and beautifully, as though they were made to fit together like this.
Jared groaned into her hair, moving a covetous hand down her back while he held her ass in place to accept his thrusts. “You’re so hot, so wet. You feel so damn incredible that I’m not going to last very long.”
Mara smiled as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders, their bodies skin to skin as he stroked into her sheath again and again. The position was intimate, every part of them touching as they flew higher and higher together. She tightened her legs around his waist, luxuriating in the affinity flowing between them, feeling every rapid beat of his heart against her naked flesh every time he thrust and retreated again.
I’m not going to last very long.
What was with his obsession about taking forever to come?
Control.
She knew she was right. The mask he wore was one of complete authority over himself and his actions, rigid restraint probably to make up for his emotional decision that had left him bleeding inside for years.
“I don’t need you to last. I just want you. I need you, Jared. Fuck me harder.” She nipped at the side of his neck, knowing she was daring him to lose his discipline and conditioning, the wall he’d built up around himself for protection. “You feel so good,” she panted into his ear, rotating her hips sensuously, taking his cock deeper with every thrust.
“Can’t. Lose. Control.” His voice was guttural and determined. “Need you to come with me.”
Mara had no doubt she was going to come hard. She was on the edge, her body already shivering with sensation. Being entwined with Jared like this, her hard nipples abrading against the coarse hair on his chest, feeling his hard, hot breath on her neck as he struggled for dominance over his orgasm—every single sensation intoxicated her.