“We thought you were asleep,” Sed said.
“Dude,” Eric said, loping into the foyer to join the festivities, “where the fuck did you get those socks?”
“Jessica said I have to wear them with my tux.” Sed looked down at his socks and scowled.
“You could have brought them and changed into them later instead of wearing them now,” Eric said.
He punched Eric in the shoulder. “But I want to make sure they’re nice and smelly before the ceremony.”
The mechanical whir of Dave’s wheelchair announced his arrival into the increasingly crowded foyer.
“Why are we all congregating out here?” Dave said. “The strippers are getting lonely.”
“Strippers?” Sed’s band and crew had thrown him a wild and rather incriminating bachelor party a few nights before. He didn’t need any repeats this morning.
Brian chuckled and shook his head. “Myrna’s having some work done in the dining room. They’re stripping wallpaper off the walls this morning.”
“Good one, Dave!” Eric said with a hearty laugh.
“I think I’ve been hanging around with you too much,” Dave said. “Your lame sense of humor is wearing off on me.”
“Five minutes is too much when it comes to Eric,” Sed teased.
“That’s what she said,” Dave added with a laugh.
Eric had no qualms against smacking his brother-in-law in the forehead.
“Where’s Jace?” Sed asked, noting the absence of the final member of his band.
“Asleep on Brian’s couch,” Trey said. “You know he doesn’t function before noon.”
“I think Aggie got a little vicious with him last night in the dungeon,” Eric said. “It’s got to be rough for them on the road without their St. Andrew’s cross.”
“I heard that,” Jace called from the living room off to the right of the foyer.
“What are you going to do about it, Tripod?” Eric asked.
“Gift you an hour-long session from Aggie when she’s on her period.”
“Eww, why when she’s on her period?” Eric asked, his long nose crinkled in disgust.
“Because she’s twice as vicious when she’s in a really bad mood.”
Sed still hadn’t taken Jessica for a training session with Aggie. He wasn’t afraid or anything. But now that Jess was pregnant, he couldn’t imagine that her using a cane on him to work through her frustrations would be good for the baby. Yeah, good excuse. It was bad for the baby.
Brian presented Sed with a piece of paper. “Jessica said you are to follow this schedule and not deviate from it at all.”
Sed scanned the contents, scowling at things like trim nails and brush teeth. What? Was he five? He glanced at his fingernails and decided they could use a trim, but still… He could plan things on his own. In fact, he’d planned their entire wedding dinner on his own. When he’d realized that a morning wedding and an afternoon reception meant they’d have the evening free, he’d taken it upon himself to arrange something special so he could celebrate his new wife in style. Having sex in another unusual location had only been part of his motivation for devising his plan. He’d rock her world tonight, he had no doubt. But he knew how important it was for her day to go without a hitch, so he’d follow her stupid list without argument.
Eric handed him a pink box that looked like something a three-year-old would store her beloved plastic princess tiara in.
“What’s this?” Sed asked.
“This is where you’ll keep your balls once you’re married,” Eric said. “Jess probably doesn’t want to continue keeping them for you.”
Eric ducked in time to avoid Sed’s retaliating slap.
“It only hurts for a minute,” Brian said, “and then you’ll wonder why you ever insisted on holding on to them in the first place.”
This bit of teasing was nothing compared to the massive ball and chain they’d manacled to his leg during his bachelor party. They hadn’t removed it until late the next day. Luckily, Jess thought it was hilarious when he came to bed that night and had to sleep in his jeans with his leg dangling outside the covers. It had been Jace who’d finally come to his rescue. Probably because the manacle had originated in Aggie’s dungeon.
“I need mine for baby making,” Sed said and handed the box back to Eric. “And keeping my woman in line.”
Even the strippers in the dining room laughed at that claim.
Chapter Two
Jessica looked skyward and frowned at the heavy black clouds rolling in. Not a good omen, she decided. Especially since her wedding was scheduled to start in two hours and was supposed to take place on the beach.
“It can’t rain,” she said to Myrna, who was driving her from her nail appointment to her hair appointment. “It just can’t.”
Myrna scrunched her neck so she could see the sky better out the windshield of her minivan, a vehicle Jessica couldn’t believe the woman owned, much less drove. But the soft coo from the back seat—where four-month-old Malcolm was secured in his car seat—was the only excuse Myrna needed. Jessica supposed any mother would give up driving her ’57 Thunderbird convertible to keep her baby safe. And the van came in handy for lugging Jessica’s bridesmaids from one appointment to the next. It even had room for the only male tagging along for the day.
“Can’t is a strong word,” Myrna said.
“We’ve been planning this for months.”