She’s killing me, bit by bit. I tuck a lock of her hair back, use the gesture as an excuse to stroke her cheek. But she isn’t finished talking.
Pressing her cheek into my palm, she smiles a little. “At graduation, you wore a robe, of course, and a dark red tie. Nothing special, but you stood next to me while I took pictures of Ivy and Gray. A guy running by almost knocked right into me, but you stepped between us at the last second and took the impact.”
I can’t speak. She doesn’t seem to need that. Fi leans down and kisses the hollow of my neck. I feel it in my heart, in my toes.
“Draft day, you wore a dark gray suit and a sky blue tie. It made your eyes look more blue than hazel. Everyone around you was nervous. Gray was practically jumping in place, sweating and pulling at his collar. But you simply sat at the table and drank your water.”
She chuckles, the sound a purr that makes my skin go tight. “I asked if you were nervous, and you winked at me, told me—”
“Nerves won’t get me drafted any sooner,” I finish for her, my voice husky and thick.
Her smile blooms wide. “Exactly.”
She presses her lips to my sternum before lifting her head again. “I remember everything about you, Ethan. It just took me a while to do it.”
I take a breath. Then another. Pressure builds at the bridge of my nose and behind my eyelids. “Cherry.”
I kiss her softly, gently, just because I can. And she threads her fingers through my hair, playing with it as if she loves the feel of me.
But she doesn’t linger. Instead she moves on, kissing my brows. My eyes close, and she kisses the lids. Her voice comes at me like a dream. “I’m no one special, just a girl who tries to do the right thing when she can.”
My eyes snap open. “You are everything,” I protest with a fierce whisper. “You are perfect—”
She gives me a quick kiss. “To you, I am. But I guess that’s the point. No one has ever looked at me as though they want me—all of me just as I am—until you, Ethan.”
“Because I do,” I tell her. “I always have.”
“And I don’t want anyone but you. It doesn’t matter if we’re a thousand miles apart or right next to each other, I will always want you. Because that’s how it is when you find your forever.”
My nostrils flare on a sharp breath. I haul her close, wrapping my arms around her so tight, I’m probably crushing her. But I can’t let go. My face burrows in her hair. On the next breath, I’m rolling over her and pushing inside of her with a mindless need to feel the tight clasp of her body.
She makes a little sound—half-whimper, half-groan—and I freeze, realizing that, in my desperation, I didn’t check to see if she was ready. She’s slick, but not enough. I move to draw away, maybe kiss between her legs and make it better.
But her hand slides down my back and grasps my ass. “Don’t stop,” she whispers. Please don’t stop.”
A groan tears out of me, and I thrust again, find her mouth with mine. Her body yields to me, soft and luscious, slick and tight.
Awareness ripples over my body. I feel the clench of my ass when I thrust, the tight pull of my abs as I drag back out. My skin prickles with heat, and my panting breaths mix with hers.
I get lost in the act of loving Fi, moving in and out of her with strong, steady strokes that have my cock pulsing and my balls drawing tight. I kiss her until my lips are swollen and sensitive.
Beneath me, Fi’s slim body trembles, little gasps leaving her as she lifts her hips to meet mine every time.
“You like that, darlin’?” I murmur into her mouth. “Like my cock moving inside you?”
She grips my ass harder, urging me deeper. “Yes. Yes.”
“Good, because it’s yours, Cherry. You’re the only one who will ever own this cock.” I rock into her, the bed creaking beneath us. “The only one who ever has.”
She whimpers, her back arching, her sweat-slicked skin pearlescent in the dim light. “Ethan…” The stiff tips of her nipples brush my chest as she writhes. “Ethan…”
She’s close. So close. The knowledge sends a punch of hot pleasure up my inner thighs. “Let go, Cherry love.” I thrust, working that spot within her that I know she loves. “Let go. I’ve got you.”
Fi’s entire body locks up on a wordless cry. Her head presses into the pillow, her nails digging into my flesh as she comes. Slick wetness coats my thighs as the walls of her sex milk my cock with rhythmic tugs.
It sends me over the edge, and I come with her, shouting so loud it echoes through the room. Panting, I roll to my side, pull her close. My body is limp with release. Fi lies quiet, and I can feel the pounding of her heart against her ribs.
A lone tear trickles down her cheek, but she’s softly smiling, her expression relaxed. “I needed that.”
I’m pretty sure I needed it more.
I brush away the tear with the tip of my thumb and kiss the corner of her eye. “Whatever you need, Fi, I’ll give to you.”
Even if it breaks my heart to do it.
Chapter Forty-Three
Fiona
Trudging to the bathroom, I feel hollow, yet calmer. Last night with Ethan made me remember how good it can be between us, how necessary. Nothing is perfect, but I feel grounded now. A little more myself.
In the shower, I turn the water to as hot as I can stand it. Ethan’s shower is a glorious thing with multiple heads, designed to shoot out water at different speeds and strengths. The first time I used it, they were all adjusted to his height, and I got a face full of water.