Inhaling deeply, I squared my shoulders. I wanted to rant and rave. “Okay.”
“Okay? You’re not going to give me evil Kitten eyes?”
I shook my head, focused on his chest. Sudden emotion crawled up, getting stuck in my throat.
“Hell must’ve frozen over.” His fingers splayed across my cheek. “Hey…”
Pressing forward, I rested my head against him, and my fingers dug into his sides. One arm slipped to my waist, and he held me close. “I’m sorry,” I said, swallowing hard.
“A lot has happened, Kat. There is no need to apologize. We all are doing the best we can right now.”
Lifting my head, I blinked back tears. “And you? Are you doing okay?”
He stared down at me, silent.
“You don’t blame yourself for what happened back in Vegas, do you? It wasn’t your fault. None of it.”
Daemon was silent for a very long time. “It was my idea.”
My heart turned over heavily. “But we all got behind it.”
“Maybe there was something different we could’ve done.” He looked away, throat constricting. A taut pull appeared at the corners of his mouth. “The whole way here I kept thinking it over. What other options did we have?”
“We didn’t have any.” I wanted to crawl inside him and somehow make it better.
“Are we sure of that?” His voice was quiet. “We didn’t have a lot of time to think it through.”
“We didn’t have any time.”
Daemon nodded slowly, eyes narrowed and focused on the tree line. “Ash and Andrew and Paris—they didn’t deserve that. I know they agreed to it and knew the risks, but I can’t believe that they are…”
I stretched up, cupping his cheeks. The aching spread though my chest, becoming a physical pain. “I’m so sorry, Daemon. I wish there was something more I could say. I know they were like your family. And I know they meant the world to you. Their deaths aren’t your fault, though. Please don’t think that. I couldn’t—”
He silenced me with a kiss—a sweet, tender kiss that eclipsed all my words. “I need to tell you something,” he said. “You might hate me afterward.”
“What?” I pulled back, totally not expecting that comment. “I couldn’t hate you.”
He cocked his head to the side. “I gave you a lot of reasons to hate me in the beginning.”
“Yeah, you did, but that was in the beginning. Not anymore.”
“You haven’t heard what I have to say.”
“It doesn’t matter.” I sort of wanted to punch him in the face for even suggesting that.
“It does.” He took a breath. “You know, when the shit started really going down back in Vegas, I had my doubts. When I saw Paris get taken out, then Andrew and Ash, I asked myself if I would’ve done this again, the same way, knowing the risks.”
“Daemon…”
“The thing is, I knew the risks when I got out of the car. I knew people could die and that didn’t stop me. And when I looked up and saw you standing there, alive and okay, I knew I would do it all over again.” His bright emerald eyes settled on me. “I would do it, Kat. How incredibly selfish is that? How messed up? I think that makes me pretty worthy of your distaste.”
“No,” I said, and then I said it again. “I get what you’re saying, Daemon. It doesn’t make me hate you.”
His jaw clamped down. “It should.”
“Look, I don’t know what to say. Is it a hundred percent right? Probably not. But I understand it. I understood why Matthew turned Dawson and Bethany over and then tried to turn us over. We’ll all do crazy shit to protect the ones we love. It may not be right, but…but it is what it is.”
He stared down at me.
“And you can’t beat yourself up over this. Not when you told me I couldn’t beat myself up over what happened with Adam because of the decisions I made.” My breath was shaky. I wanted to erase the pain in his eyes, the hurt. “I couldn’t hate you. Ever. I love you no matter what. And it doesn’t matter what happens in the future or what happened before this.” Tears burned my eyes. “I will always love you. And we are in this together. That’s never going to change. Do you understand?”
When he said nothing, my heart skipped. “Daemon?”
He moved so fast that he startled me. He kissed me again. It wasn’t sweet and tender like the last one. It was fierce, intense, and powerful—a thank-you and a promise rolled into one. That kiss broke me down and then rebuilt me. His kiss…well, it made me.
He made me.
And because of that, I knew it went both ways. He made me. And I made him.
…
Daemon
The trip into town with Dawson had been surprisingly uneventful. We were in and out of the market quickly. There was no avoiding the newspapers with pictures of glowing figures splashed all across them or overhearing the conversations while in line. Some of it was just plain crazy, but tension cloaked the people in the store, in a small town nestled against a lake, a world away from Vegas.
From what we could gather, the government hadn’t made any official announcement with the exception of declaring a state of emergency for Nevada and labeling the “horrific actions” an act of terrorism.
Things were going to get bad. Not just from the human standpoint but from the Luxen. Many of them had no problems living in secrecy. We’d blown that right through the roof. And then there were those who would take advantage of the chaos, like Luc had said. I couldn’t help but think about Ethan White, and his warning.