During the day, when she had been showing one condo after another to a man who had more money than sense, she had come to realize that she had been working diligently to be something she wasn’t. A Domme. She had wasted years of her life trying to dominate men because that kept them at a distance; it refrained them from having any power over her.
The way her father had when she was just a child.
And now she had no power whatsoever.
But worse than that, she feared that Xander thought less of her for it. If he were as interested in her as he acted, he was probably rethinking now that he knew she was weak.
Mercedes knew the type of women he dated. They were all strong willed, even if they submitted to him sexually. They weren’t the meek submissives he tended to play with from time to time at Kink. The women who held his interest wouldn’t just roll over and give up.
God, she hated this pity party she’d thrown herself. She wanted to get out of her funk, but the day had only continued to get worse when she realized Xander had never called. At least not until he needed a date to a business dinner with Logan and Samantha.
Oh, sure, she had tried to sound relieved, but the truth was, she had been disappointed. Xander hadn’t been planning a romantic dinner for just the two of them. He hadn’t had any intention of spending time with her.
Or maybe this was his way of letting her down gently. Moving their relationship back to a platonic – slash – business friendship. He probably hoped she wouldn’t even realize it.
“What do you think?”
Mercedes focused on the faces around her and realized Samantha had asked her a direct question. Since she had absolutely no idea what they were talking about, she felt like a fool sitting there staring at her.
“I’m sorry. If you’ll excuse me,” she muttered, reaching for her clutch and rising from her chair.
At the exact same time, both men stood, neither of them reclaiming their seats until she was several feet away.
Rather than run to the bathroom and break down in tears like she first intended, Mercedes did something worse.
She took off out of the restaurant and straight to her car. And as soon as she was safely inside, the tears broke free and didn’t stop, even when she walked through her front door.
Chapter Thirty Seven
Xander knew the moment Mercedes excused herself that she was going to bolt from the restaurant and not look back. No, he hadn’t gone after her. He had wanted to, he just hadn’t done it. But that was because he was hoping against hope that she would decide to come back on her own.
When he realized the inevitable had happened, and Mercedes had been gone for fifteen minutes, Xander kindly asked Sam if she would go check on her. A few minutes after that, Sam had returned to inform him that she wasn’t in the restroom but that she did inquire with the hostess, and the woman personally saw Mercedes leave the restaurant a short while ago.
Not surprising.
Without hesitating, Xander had excused himself with a quick apology to Logan and Samantha, who politely waved him off, encouraging him to go after her. On his way out, he left his credit card number with the waiter and headed for his car. The drive home took half the time it should have, but he was a man on a mission.
Once he made it to Mercedes’s front door, he didn’t even bother knocking. Instead, he used the key he had and waltzed right in.
That was when his heart had lurched right into his throat.
Following the sound coming from the back of the condo, Xander slowly made his way, his heart racing as he closed the distance between himself and the woman he loved.
Just as he thought, she was in her bedroom. With one foot inside the room, he came to a halt when he saw her standing in front of the floor to ceiling windows, silhouetted by the bright lights of the city in the distance.
But she wasn’t admiring the view.
She was crying.
Rooted in place by the sight, he tried desperately to find his voice but couldn’t. He cleared his throat in an attempt to dislodge the giant knot of emotion that had formed upon hearing her soft sobs, and to alert her to his presence.
In a move that was very unlike Mercedes, she turned to face him, not bothering to try and wipe the tears he knew were streaming down her face. Although she was in shadow, he could still see her face. She didn’t smile, and she didn’t offer any excuses as to what she was upset about.
He already knew.
He was the reason for the tears and the thought made his gut churn.
Knowing Mercedes, she had spent the better part of the day trying to come to terms with what had happened last night. But, unlike him, she wasn’t coming to the same conclusion Xander had.
No, Mercedes wasn’t thinking that the reason he’d ended their scene so abruptly had anything to do with the fact that he had fallen in love with her. She wasn’t the glass half full type of woman.