“Fuck me.” He sucked in a breath. “You tattooed your nipple, too. You must have a high pain tolerance.” His eyes glinted as a Cheshire grin spread his lips.
My jaw locked as repulsion shuddered through me. I knocked his hand away. My stomach rolled. “I think the fire would’ve hurt more than anything a man with a needle could ever do. I’m immune to pain. And now thanks to the bastard behind me, I’m immune to emotional pain, too.”
Gathering spit in my mouth, I spat it right onto Mr. Steel’s chin.
Everyone froze.
Kill growled, “Fuck!”
Mr. Steel hadn’t moved and I shoved him. I didn’t know if it was shock or sheer disbelief that a slave girl had spat and cursed him but he didn’t move.
I rounded on Kill.
He backed up, eyes wide. “Stop it. Just fucking stop it!”
“Stop it? You stop it!” I shoved him just like I had Mr. Steel. My fingers sparked from touching his chest, but I welcomed the fire, nursing it deep in my heart. “Stop being so fucking weak, Art!”
Then I was falling, spread on the plush carpet with a man above. The steward flew from nowhere, wrenching my arms behind my back, binding them with twine. A harrowing flashback of being bound at the very beginning of this mess made me snap.
“Don’t touch me!” I bucked and squirmed, gaining carpet burn for my efforts.
But it was no use.
“Get off her!” Kill shouted. The weight of the steward disappeared and Killian hauled me to my feet. He breathed harder than I did, his face white and tight. Glaring at Mr. Steel, who’d climbed to his feet and now stood livid with anger, he hissed, “Do we have a fucking deal or not?”
“What?” I yelled. Then… I laughed. It was the only output I had left. Sheer mania. “You’re insane.” I laughed harder. “You’re certifiably nuts. God, what the hell was I doing thinking I could convince you.”
Kill didn’t say anything; he just stood and watched me unravel with that bone-breaking despair in his eyes. I hated that despair. I hated that even now I wanted to fix him, save him. Even after everything he’d done and let happen.
Mr. Steel’s voice cut through my crazed giggles. “You’re lucky I like strong women, otherwise you’d have a bullet in your fucking brain and this meeting would be over.”
I couldn’t stop the silent humor still shaking my frame. I didn’t know why I couldn’t stop. Panic? Terror? It didn’t matter because it made me feel powerful and unpredictable and above these men who drove me mad.
The twine around my wrists wasn’t tied properly and I shrugged out of it, throwing the binds at Mr. Steel. “Here’s what I think of you and your boat. It’s not strong enough to hold me.” I giggled again, tears forming in my eyes.
Don’t fall. Please don’t fall.
Even if it was from mirth, I didn’t want tears. If they trickled down my cheeks that would be it for me. They would propel me into the deepest sadness I’d ever known.
I was so close to snapping completely. One brittle splinter from losing my mind forever.
Mr. Steel smiled. “You’re different, I’ll give you that.” Inching forward, he whispered, “In fact, you have me so intrigued I’m willing to make you a deal. Obey my next request and I’ll treat you like a queen rather than a whore. Whatever I take from you, I’ll give back tenfold.” His fingers kissed my cheek sending icicles to my heart. “I’ll worship you all while I destroy you.”
The fire that’d brutalized my skin now lived inside me. Vengeance. I never knew what it felt like before, but now I did. I wanted revenge on Arthur “Kill” Killian. I wanted to shove what he’d made me become in his face so he would never ever forget me.
Arching my chin, I seethed, “Fine. It’s more than he ever gave me.”
The sharp intake of breath and the soft clinking of a heart breaking came from behind. I didn’t turn. I was done with him.
“Strip, lovely girl. Show me everything you are and I’ll make you mine.” Mr. Steel backed away, his touch still freezing my cheek like a permanent mark.
Tension sprang into the cabin. Billowing heat and intensity came from behind me from Kill. My eyes narrowed as the scent of lust sprang into the air.
My muscles locked.
If I did this, I would willingly hand myself over to the devil. If I did this, I would turn my back on Sarah, on Buttercup, on every single thing I’d fought so hard to remember. I would say good-bye once and for all to the boy I’d once loved in my nightmares.
I’ll never wake up from this.
Balling my hands, I looked over my shoulder at Kill. He looked ruined—destroyed—a shadow of the biker lord who’d kissed me so savagely.
My heart hurt to see him in pieces. Then fortified to know I’d won.
Gritting my teeth, I slid my hands beneath my red curls and tugged at the bikini strings. The triangles of gold sprang away, dangling down my stomach as I reached behind my back and unsecured the rest.
Kill sucked in a ragged breath. “Sarah—”
I tensed, never looking at him. “My name isn’t Sarah anymore.”
His lips turned white and the look of absolute regret in his eyes almost undid me.
Almost.
Mr. Steel smiled wilder. “Good girl. And the rest.”
My hands fell from my back, landing on the ties on my hips. A patch of sunlight drenched me in rays and warmth, spilling through the circular window.
Don’t!
What are you doing?
This wasn’t me. This vengeful hate. It wasn’t true, barely hiding the agony and betrayal I felt beneath. But I’d gone too far. I—
“Sarah… stop—” The blatant begging in Kill’s tone tore my eyes to his. The pain in his gaze shoved the dagger the final inch into my heart, killing me for eternity. He never looked at my naked chest, pouring his confusion into soul.
Tension thickened.
Hearts raced.
Lips parted.
I waited for him to fight for me. I waited for him to apologize and admit to everything.
But the weakness inside dropped his eyes, the despair smothering him completely.
Art.
“Do it,” Mr. Steel ordered, breaking our fragile trance.
My fingers looped around the bikini ties.
My fingers tugged.
My fingers shook.
But I didn’t have the courage to pull them apart.
Kill’s eyes came back up, his mouth twisted with sorrow. Darkness from both sides tried to devour me, but light streamed over me like a sparkling waterfall. Golden rays dappled my body as my fingers pulled… tighter and tighter… so close to untethering the final bows that hid my decency.
Then something happened.
Something I didn’t understand.
Kill’s eyes fell from mine, licking my body with everything he felt and couldn’t say. My nipples pebbled; my core grew wet with the shameless lust on his face. But there was something more.
Something so much more.
His eyes latched onto my hipbone, directed by the spotlight of sunshine.
A look of utter horror crossed his features.
A cry fell from his lips.
His body crumbled in on itself like an earthquake ravaged building, stumbling to one knee.
His soul fractured, glowing brokenly on his face.
Then joy.
Sheer blinding building joy.
In an instant, he pushed upright and grabbed me in his embrace. I couldn’t speak or breathe or ask what the hell had happened. His body shook and rattled as he crushed me to him—giving me everything he’d kept locked away in one simple hug.
Shivers and trembles erupted over my skin. His touch was everything I’d wanted—a harbor in this sea of craziness. What did this mean?
Uncertainty bubbled in my chest, churning with tears.
Then he pushed me away, his large hand splaying over my sternum and bending me further into the sunlight.
His unsaid emotions waked and eddied around us as I struggled in his hold. “What—what are you doing?”
Mr. Steel ceased to exist. The yacht was no longer our location. Kill had stolen me into his own world with one possessive hold.
His breathing was ragged. Ignoring me, he fixated on my hip.
His head bowed over my body, his long hair sweeping forward and tickling my naked cleavage as his lips moved silently.
Then my world ended as his green eyes met mine, only this time there was no confusion.
No despair.
No anger.
Only belief.
Blazing belief that humbled and terrified me.
His lips parted, sucking in a tattered heavy breath. He no longer looked at me like a brutish biker but like a lover who’d found his precious ever after.
The amazed adoration glowing in his eyes brought tears spilling over my cheeks.
He believes.
He knows.
His lips crashed on mine and his tongue shot into my mouth. With his dark taste came freedom—in one move he tore the dagger free from my heart and magically twisted my hate into undying love.
Breathing against my lips, he lamented, “I’m so sorry. So unbelievably sorry.”
“What the fuck is going on?” The sound of a gun clicked as Mr. Steel dispersed our reunion, dragging us back into horror.
My naked breasts suddenly felt too vulnerable. My chest open and revealing my rapidly beating heart.
Kill wrenched me behind his back, protecting me with his large frame. “I’ll tell you what the fuck is going on. The deal’s off.”