Oh gosh, my heart was breaking all over again. I didn’t know what it was like to be Roth, to be something that was just the latest in the long line that came before him. Other Princes that the Boss had grown tired of, destroyed in one way or another, before creating this version of Astaroth. And I didn’t know everything Roth had done in his past, but in all honestly, I didn’t care. Who was I to judge? Being that I was nowhere near perfect and was also part demon, myself, I’d done things I wished I hadn’t, and I knew there would be things in the future that I’d want to take back. But Roth had spent eighteen years keeping the Boss of Hell happy. None of his darkness surprised me.
It just saddened me.
Leaning down, I kissed his cheek, and as I straightened, he turned wide amber eyes on me. “I see what you don’t.” I ran my hand up and down his arm. “You’re not selfish, even if you have moments of acting like it. We all do. You’re not evil, even if you were created by the greatest evil of them all. You’ve proven to me and yourself that you have free will, and you’ve made the right decisions time and time again.”
As I dragged my hand up his arm, he shuddered. “You’ve accepted who and what I am from the beginning. You’ve never tried to change me or...or hide me. You’ve always trusted me, even when you probably shouldn’t have.” I laughed at that, thinking of the time he’d left me alone in the Palisades club with explicit instructions not to roam off. “You’ve...you’ve celebrated what I am, and very few can claim that. Like I’ve said before, you’re more than the latest Crown Prince. You’re Roth.”
For a moment, he didn’t move or blink. Then wonderment filled his expression as he stared up at me, and finally, the tension eased out of his muscles. “And I’m yours.”
seven
AT SOME POINT, I managed to tuck Roth into bed and Bambi eventually followed. That was quite the spectacle to witness, a blitzed demonic anaconda attempting to slither onto a bed. I had to step in and lift her back end, and then I’d carefully scooped up the kitten passed out on the dresser and placed it on the bed, as well. I could only hope Bambi wouldn’t eat little Thor if she woke up in the middle of the night with drunken hunger pains.
Then I set about cleaning up the bottles. I stopped counting the ones that had been in the bedroom and took the rattling bag out to the trash. Afterward, I made myself a sandwich and checked in on Stacey.
She was doing as well as could be expected, and she also confirmed that Roth had indeed made an anonymous call. “The police came by this afternoon. Mom thought it was about the house fire, but it was...it was about Sam.”
Sitting in the living room, curled up against the back of an oversize cushion, I closed my eyes. “His family...”
“I know.” Her breath was shaky through the connection. “They told me. They also asked if I’d seen him. I went with the last time he’d been at school. Yesterday.”
“That was smart.”
A pause, and then, “God, Layla, how did any of this happen? Two months ago, I would’ve never seen any of this coming— Hold on,” she said, and I heard a door closing. “My mom has been following me around ever since the police showed up. She’s worried and scared. The police think that Sam...that he snapped and wiped out his family. It’s going to be all over school tomorrow, and it’s not right. You know? That people are going to believe that Sam did something like that.”
“It isn’t,” I agreed, opening my eyes. There was a painting hung on the wall across from me. A picturesque road with autumn on full display, but the bright oranges and reds were dulled. “Sam didn’t deserve any of this.”
“None of us do.” There was another deep inhale on her end. “Okay. I need to be distracted, because otherwise I’m going to lose it again. I’ve been losing it about every hour, on the hour. Okay? Distract me.”
“Um...” My brain emptied. Real helpful there. “Ah, I suck at this.”
She laughed hoarsely. “What’s Roth doing?”
“Well, he’s... Yeah, he’s kind of incapacitated right now.” I cringed, knowing how that sounded.
“Really?” Interest perked her tone. “Why?”
I glanced at the wide archway. “I told him this morning that I needed to talk to Zayne, and I guess he thought that meant that I was going to tell Zayne I wanted to be with him. So he might have gotten a little drunk.”
A strangled giggle came through the phone and my heart lifted at the sound. “Are you serious?”
“Yep. And his familiars? They’re drunk, too.” I paused, grinning a little. “It was quite the show.”
“I can imagine. Nope. Wait. I can’t. You need to go get pictures of this for me.”
I smiled even though that was not going to happen.
“So...you don’t want to be with Zayne? You’ve been obsessed with him since I met you.”
“I wouldn’t say obsessed.” It felt really wrong talking about this with Stacey, but she’d asked to be distracted, so I would do whatever she wanted. “You know I love Zayne. Always have and will, but Roth? He’s...”
“He’s the one,” she said quietly.
“Yeah. As much as he annoys the ever-loving crud out of me, I kind of love that he does. I know that sounds twisted, but it’s true.” I unfurled my legs and stood, curling one arm around my stomach as I started to pace the length of the room, wearing a little path in the Oriental carpet. “I... I love him, Stacey. I really do.”
“I’m not surprised,” was her response.
I started to grin again as I made my second pass in front of the couch. “Oh, really?”
“Nope. I’ve seen the way he looks at you. Seen the way you look at him. It was always different with Zayne. Not knocking him. You know I’d give up my left ovary for a shot at that—God, that’s kind of really bad form right now, isn’t it? Like too soon even as a joke?” She sighed heavily. “I’m a terrible person.”
“No! Oh, gosh no! Don’t think that at all, and you’re not a terrible person.”
“Can...can I ask you something? And you’ll answer me honestly?”
I stopped in front of the painting. “Of course.”
“Promise,” she whispered.
“Promise.”
A moment passed before she spoke. “I’ve been thinking about this a lot. I never really started paying attention to Sam until he started changing, you know? When he started dressing differently and styling his hair. When he started getting confident...”
Oh no.
“And this whole time, all of that, it was never Sam.” Her voice cracked a little. “That was that thing pretending to be him. Does that mean I fell for that thing, Layla? And not Sam? And what does that say about me?”
“Oh, Stacey...don’t go down that path. The truth is, I think you always liked Sam, it just took you a while to recognize it. You didn’t fall for the Lilin.”
“You sure?” Her voice sounded tiny and so very young.
“I’m sure of that, and look at it this way. The Lilin, it acted like Sam so much that none of us could tell the difference. You thought it was Sam. I thought it was Sam—a version of him that finally figured out how to use a comb.”
Stacey’s laugh was a pleasant shock to my ears. “Yeah. Okay.”
Tiny knots formed in my belly. “You get what I’m saying, right? You don’t think that about yourself.”
“No. I mean, I just... I needed to hear you say what you said. That’s all,” she promised, and I hoped she was telling the truth. “When can I see you so I can get the deets about you and Roth in person?”
I wasn’t sure what details I could give her since we really hadn’t talked, at least not when both of us were sober. “You going to class on Monday?”
“Probably so. What about you?”
My shoulders slumped. “I really want to, but right now we’ve got to figure out how to take care of the Lilin, and I’ve missed so much time.”
“Oh, Layla.”
I shook my head, not wanting to dwell on that at this moment. “Once everything is squared away, I’ll figure something out. Anyway, I can try to come see you after school. Depends on what we do.”
We made plans to text each other, but before I got off the phone, she stopped me.
“Layla?”
“Yeah?”
Her sharp inhale was audible. “Promise me that you will help Sam. That we can make this right for him.”
My free hand squeezed into a fist, until the tips of my nails dug into my palms. “I promised you I would. I’m not going to break that promise.”
* * *
Once night had fallen and a quick check assured me that Roth was still asleep, surrounded by snoring familiars, I grabbed a quilt off the foot of the master bed and stepped out onto a balcony that faced some kind of nature reserve.
A small, misty cloud of visible breath parted my lips as I tipped my head back. The night was clear, full of stars that twinkled like a thousand tiny, distant diamonds. I walked to the railing, pulling the blanket closer to me.