I got my last word out and then I had my back to the floor and Joker was on me.
He was tugging at my clothes.
I returned the gesture.
Desperate, breathing heavily, clothes flying, lips dragging, mouths connecting, tongues tasting, hands roaming, nails scratching, fingers tangling, we went at each other, Joker on top, me on top, and back, and again, until I could take no more.
“Condom, baby,” I breathed my plea.
He reached out and dragged his jeans our way.
“Back, spread, hold for me, Carrie,” he ordered.
I rolled off him to my back and did as he asked.
He rolled on the condom and wasted no time covering me.
But as frantic as it was getting to that point, right then, his body on mine, my legs circling his hips, my arms curved up his back, hands splayed on his shoulder blades, his eyes locked to mine, his weight in one forearm, the other arm under me, wrapped around my waist, I felt the tip and then he slid in slowly.
My lips parted as I took him inch by inch until he was buried completely.
“So fuckin’ pretty,” he murmured, gaze still on me.
I closed my eyes.
I was in love.
I opened them and whispered, “Please, please, don’t ever mention leaving me again.”
His response was to dip his head and slide his nose along mine as he groaned, “I won’t, Butterfly.”
“Ever, Carson. Promise me.”
“Promise, baby.”
I touched my lips to his. “Thank you, sweetie.”
He slanted his head and kissed me.
Then as slowly as he entered me, he made love to me, on the floor by the dining room set.
Necessarily, of course, it ended up faster, harder, breathtaking, overwhelming.
Astounding.
And after, lying on my back on the floor under Joker feeling my climax leave me as his weight and warmth pressed into me, his breaths feathering against my neck, it came to me again.
This was my place.
This was me.
This was precisely where I was meant to be.
“Did you turn off the water?” I asked.
Joker’s body moved sharply with his short, startled laugh.
Then he lifted his head, looked me in the eyes, and answered, “Yeah, Carrie.”
“Good,” I mumbled.
His hand came up and he brushed some curls away from my forehead before he said, “We’re gonna be okay.”
I nodded.
“It’s all gonna be okay, baby,” he whispered.
I stared into his eyes and I knew it would.
I knew it.
Because I knew, lying there on the floor with Joker still inside me, his weight bearing into me, this was his place.
And like me, he liked his place.
So he’d never leave.
Joker
The next day, Joker waited a long time, leaning against his bike next to the black Lexus SUV.
Eventually he showed.
Walking to his car from the courthouse, the fucker clocked him, stopped, took out his phone, and shot a picture of Joker.
Joker didn’t move.
He knew what the jackhole would do next.
Aaron Neiland was not a man to let the opportunity for a confrontation slide.
So he did what Joker knew he’d do.
He walked right up to Joker and declared, “You can’t intimidate me.”
“She’s happy.”
The man went stock-still.
“Unless you’re on the phone fuckin’ with her head, or after, when you get in there and I got work to do to sort her out, she’s happy. She’s the mother of your kid, man, you should want that for her. She hasn’t had a lot of it her life, but now she’s got steady. She’s got peace. Leave her be and give her that.”
“She deserves better,” Neiland retorted.
“You’re right,” Joker agreed. “You had your shot and you tore her up. Now she’s found better.”
Neiland’s upper lip lifted in a sneer. “Are you saying you’re better than me?”
“I’m sayin’ for Carissa I am.”
He shook his head. “Unbelievable that you’ve convinced yourself of that.”
“No,” Joker returned. “What’s unbelievable is that you two made a kid. You made a fuckin’ miracle, man, and doin’ it, you assumed a responsibility. And the mother of that kid has lost her little sister. Her mother. The man she loved cheated on her, kicked her out of his bed, his house, put another woman in it, forced her to live in a shit place that wasn’t safe for her or their baby, and he can stand there thinkin’ he’s better for her than me. That is unbelievable.”
Unable to counter that point, he turned away, “I’m not talking to you about my family.”
It was too important so Joker didn’t let it go. “All I’m askin’ is for you to let her be happy.”
He turned back. “I can make her happy.”
“Good job you’ve done of it.”
He leaned toward Joker. “She needs you now, friend. What happens when she doesn’t?”
“She’ll still be with me.”
He leaned back, smiling a nasty smile. “You’re sure?”
“Absolutely.”
“Dream world, Steele,” he scoffed.
Joker pushed away from his bike and turned fully toward him, watching the man go alert but keep his position. Though his eyes darting side to side said it all.
He didn’t want to lose face but he needed an escape plan, because he knew if it came down to fists, he’d take a beating.
But Joker didn’t move an inch toward him.
“Didn’t wanna get into this, and you don’t get it all. It’s mine and Carrie’s. But she gets from me what she didn’t get from you in a variety of ways, Neiland. She loves it. Some, she begs for it.”
“Crass, but not surprising,” he hissed.
“You mistake me,” Joker said quietly. “Part of it I see you get, but you don’t get it all. You’re so up your own ass you think she’s gotta work for it to make her deserve you. You go your own way, do your own thing, get off with who you want when you want. Test after test, and she passes, accepts you as however you wanna be, or she’s out. With me, she told me, straight up, it’s easy. I give her easy. We’re easy. And that’s because she knows where she stands with me and that ground I put her on, man, is not shaky. Now, I ask you, you want her back so bad, you want your family, then I gotta think you got some feeling for her. Some small amount a’ feeling. If you don’t, then this is not about her but about you havin’ a need to best her, or me, or both of us. But if you feel something, what I’d wanna know is, why wouldn’t you want her to have easy?”