Toni shook her head.
“This is just between you and me, okay? Don’t go selling it to the tabloids or printing it in your book.”
Toni nodded mutely.
“I fell in love with Trey so fast—like soooo fast it was ridiculous and I convinced myself it was hormones—because the guy is sex on a stick.”
Toni nodded.
“But it’s so much deeper than that. It was from the first moment we met. Sometimes you just click with someone”—Reagan snapped her fingers—“and you know on a biological and psychological level that this is the one. Or the two . . .” Reagan’s gaze shifted to the wall and she cleared her throat. “So if you feel that instantaneous connection with Logan, don’t immediately discredit it. Just because it’s a fast-burning love doesn’t mean it can’t be a long-lasting love. You just have to keep fueling the fire. Right?”
Toni had no idea. “I guess.”
“Right.” Reagan slapped her on the arm.
“How do I go about fueling the fire, exactly?” Toni asked. Sex? The answer had to be sex. Maybe anal sex. She still wasn’t keen on the idea, but if that was what it took to keep Logan’s interest, she’d allow it.
“You have to make him feel like he’s important to you.”
Well, that would be easy enough. She could see herself overdoing it, though. “But then won’t he think I’m being clingy? Or obsessed?”
“You don’t have to be all up in his face about it.”
Reagan’s nose was suddenly an inch from Toni’s as she peered into her eyes. Toni laughed at the irony. She’d never met anyone as in your face—both literally and figuratively—as Reagan Elliot.
“Even little things can make a big difference,” Reagan said.
“But what if he doesn’t feel as strongly about me as I do about him?”
“Just keep being marvelous, sweetie. He’ll come around.”
She sure hoped so.
“So are we going to do this interview or what?”
“Can I ask you something first? Completely off the record.” Toni’s curiosity had gotten the better of her. She couldn’t keep this question to herself for another second.
“Sure.”
“Are you cheating on Trey with your bodyguard?”
Reagan gaped at her. Toni couldn’t tell if she was shocked because her secret had been discovered or because someone thought she was capable of being unfaithful.
“No,” she said flatly.
Either Reagan was lying or Toni’s power of observation was less honed than she realized.
“I’m sorry if I offended you.”
“I dated Ethan before I met Trey.”
“So I guess Ethan still has feelings for you. I’ve seen the way he looks at you.” She’d also seen the way he looked at Trey, but she was obviously reading that incorrectly. Though she had been around enough gay guys to recognize attraction between two men and there was definitely attraction between those two men. Unless . . . “Wait,” Toni said as something overtly sneaky occurred to her. “Are you a cover for a relationship between Trey and Ethan?” But that didn’t explain all she’d seen either. The intimacy she’d witnessed between Trey and Reagan was obviously not fabricated.
“Wrong again.” Reagan grinned. “Can you keep a secret?”
Toni’s heart thudded, and she nodded eagerly.
“What am I saying? Of course, you can’t keep a secret,” Reagan said. “You’re a fucking journalist.”
“Except I’m not,” Toni said. “At all.”
“And that’s why you’re doing interviews and recording footage and sticking your nose in everyone’s business.”
Toni shouldn’t have felt hurt that Reagan didn’t trust her—she completely understood why Reagan would have reservations about sharing personal information—but she wanted Reagan to feel that she could confide in her and believe that Toni would keep her promises. Her integrity was worth more to her than a few lines in a tabloid or a few dollars for an incriminating picture.
“I don’t mean to be intrusive,” Toni said. “I’m just trying to get an inside look at the lives of the members of Exodus End and share that look with the world. I absolutely do not want anything in the book that could hurt any of you. I haven’t known you all long, but I consider you my friends, and I would never betray a friend’s trust.”
Reagan eyed her warily and then sighed. “Normally if a member of the media spouted that kind of nonsense in my direction, I wouldn’t hesitate to call them a liar—”
Toni cringed.
“—but for some reason, I don’t think you’re capable of being a vindictive bitch, so I’ll tell you, and you can either affirm my faith in humanity or get the shit beat out of you for betraying my trust.”
Toni swallowed hard. She wouldn’t betray Reagan’s trust, not because of Reagan’s violent threats—fabricated as they seemed—but because to be counted among the back-stabbing bitches of the world would eat Toni alive from the inside out.
“Trey is my boyfriend,” Reagan said.
Oddly, Toni was relieved that the truth wasn’t any more scandalous than that.
“And he knows that Ethan is my lover,” Reagan continued.
Okay, so maybe it was more scandalous.
“Because Ethan and Trey are lovers too.”
Jaw meet floor.
Reagan let out a deep sigh.
“I don’t know why, but it feels kind of good to tell you that,” Reagan admitted while Toni tried to remember how to blink. “I wish the world was open to polyamorous relationships. It’s becoming more open to homosexual ones, so maybe, given time . . .” Reagan tilted her head at Toni. “Are you going to pass out?”
Toni shook her head and took her first breath in over a minute. Questions began to race through her thoughts.
“So you have sex with Trey. And with Ethan. And they’re both okay with that?” Toni asked. Why was her voice so squeaky? She sounded like a mouse huffing helium.
Reagan laughed and crossed her legs, looking surprisingly at ease. “Well, yeah, since most of the time they’re both there.”
More questions bombarded Toni’s psyche. “And they do each other in front of you?”
Reagan laughed. “If I’m lucky.”
The logistics were completely out of Toni’s grasp. She had a hard enough time figuring out what to do with one cock; she’d have no idea how to keep two satisfied. But even more than the mind-bending sexual positions, Toni was struggling to grasp the emotional connection. If Logan had sex with some other woman—or man—she’d be heartbroken. She didn’t know if she’d ever be able to move past infidelity, no matter how much she loved him. But not everyone had the same ideas of sex and love as she did, and she was okay with that. She didn’t have to participate in a certain lifestyle to accept it. “So you’re in love with Trey and Ethan’s just there as a sex partner?”