"So, this is the last time, huh?"
I nodded in response, my mouth full of pizza.
"You really think you'll be able to stay away from me?"
"Oh my lord!" I groaned and looked to the ceiling in mock exasperation. "Does your ego have no bounds? As I see it - you've been the one who can't stay away." I waved a pizza crust at him to emphasize my point.
"I take an interest in all of our interns. You are the future of our company."
"Bullshit. Are you telling me you are bringing dinner to your favorite intern Woo?"
"I'm not attracted to Woo."
"And you are attracted to me?"
"Of course." He had locked his ridiculously sexy stare on me and spoke softly, but with absolute confidence and conviction. I swallowed. I wanted this man so badly it hurt. Knowing I couldn't have him made it that much more delicious.
"Well, if this is truly our last encounter, we might as well make it count."
"Meaning what?" I squeaked.
"I want to know about you. Let's finish our conversation from lunch. You can ask me anything you want, as long as I have the same privilege."
"I'm not as exciting as you are."
He turned that over in his mind, shaking his head gently as he thought godknowswhat. I started the game.
"I was told you were recently divorced. True?"
"Yes."
"Details?"
He gave me a wry glance, put his hands together on the table, looked down at them, and then at me.
"I have only been married once - to my college sweetheart. We were together 11 years, married for 7 of those. Hillary is a great girl, but we were too different, too incompatible. I think we both realized our mistake early on. But we stayed together and miserable, hoping… I don't know. That something would change. Nothing changed, and we separated."
"Who represented her in the divorce?"
He smiled slightly. "No one. We both did it unrepresented."
"That's a little unfair."
"It would have been if I hadn't given her everything. There is nothing more she could have gotten. I'd say it was extremely fair."
"Why did you give her everything?"
"I've seen divorce pull too many people to shreds. It turns people into horrible things, and gets them to the point where they hate themselves as much as their exes. It happened to my parents, and is one of the reasons I went into this business. I make sure that I am the animal - the horrible one. I don't want them to become that person. This way the couple stays civil and a fair arrangement is made." He shrugged, taking another slice of pizza. "At least that is the plan. It often goes astray."
"I'm not buying the nobility you paint divorce attorneys into."
"Hey - it normally works for chicks at the bar." He grinned, making the statement a joke, but I saw truth in his jest.
"Were you faithful?"
"To Hillary? No. I had an affair that lasted the last year of our marriage. It ended before my divorce, but was the straw that broke the camels back."
"She found out?"
"I didn't make much of an effort to hide it. I think I wanted to get caught, wanted a way out. She overlooked it for a while, until my affair starting leaving her voicemails describing our indiscretions."
"Why?"
"She wanted a relationship. My wife got in the way of that. I tried to break it off, and she got mad. Thought that she might have a chance if Hillary dumped me. Can we discuss something else?"
"Sure. Your turn. Ask away."
"What's the deal with Bob?"
"Bob is a guy I met Monday night at a bar. That's about the extent of the story."
"Did you sleep with him?"
"What?! No!"
"Really." His voice was laced with disbelief.
"Yes, really. I went home with him, but all we did was make out. I took a taxi home afterwards. I'm not a slut - I had just met the guy!"
"Yet you made enough of an impression that he tracked you down at work?"
I looked at him cockily over half a slice of pepperoni. "I guess I make quite an impression." His eyes darkened and he looked so f**king hot I had to look away. Easy Julia.
"How many men have you slept with?"
I swallowed hard, willing the chunk of pepperoni down my throat while my mind raced. I pretended to chew and waved my hand in front of my face, making the "wait a minute" sign. He looked on with amusement, enjoying my discomfort. Damn man. What is the rule with this? I multiply the real number? Or is it divide? Holy hell.
In my panic, I just decided to go with the truth. "Two."
His look was slightly confused, and then sharpened. "Two? How old are you? Did you have a long-term relationship?" His questions came out in a clump, and faster than I was able to answer them.
"Yes, two. I am 21. I was 19 when I lost my virginity, and was engaged to the second guy I slept with. We broke up about six weeks ago."
He nodded slowly, wiping his mouth with a napkin. He missed a big glob of marinara, and it stayed on the corner of his mouth. "Two people huh?"
"Yes. I don't believe in sex without commitment and love." I tried to stay serious, but he looked ridiculous with the red sauce that was beginning to drip down his chin.
"And you loved those two guys?"
"I thought I did. I was young."
"And you are so wise and old now?" He grinned. I handed him a paper towel and indicated the offending area.
"I'm wiser. Still young and vibrant." I said tartly.
"Do you enjoy sex?" The atmosphere in the room changed.
"Of course." And I did. I enjoyed the power and control it gave me.
"Then why would you limit yourself? Why require that love be attached to the act? There is no sense in living a dry, sexless existence while you wait the years it could take to find your next "love", in the meantime missing out on some of your peak sexual years! Most people don't truly fall in love. As you admit yourself, your first two loves probably weren't "loves" at all. If you follow that thought process, you will probably just get sexually frustrated and convince yourself that you love someone simply so you will allow yourself to sleep with him, which will only end in an unnecessary long relationship that will end with someone getting hurt." He looked at me in frustration, his pizza forgotten.
"Look, for you sex might be a sexual release, but I don't function the same way. Sex for me is more of an emotional thing, not anything that I NEED."