“I didn’t say anything.”
“I know. But I could hear you thinking that I should be honest with them.”
He smiled. “Okay. Have you heard from Margolis?”
She shook her head. “Not yet. And I’m not sure if that’s good news or bad news.”
“It might be no news.”
“That would fall into the bad category,” she said. “He didn’t exactly inspire a lot of confidence in his determination to attack the problem. For all I know, he hasn’t done anything yet.”
Colin nodded, acknowledging that he’d been thinking the same thing. It wasn’t what she wanted to hear, however, so he switched topics. “Tomorrow’s the big day.”
“For what?”
“Aren’t you offering your two weeks’ notice?”
“Oh yeah.” She smiled. “And yes, it’s tomorrow, but it’s strange, because I barely think about it unless I’m with Jill. It’s just so surreal. A few weeks ago, I could never have imagined that I’d be getting ready to join a start-up.”
“What do your parents think?”
“My mom’s excited, but my dad’s nervous. He knows how hard it is to start a business. He also liked telling people that I worked for Martenson, Hertzberg and Holdman.”
“For now.”
“Yes.” She flashed a wry smile. “For now.”
“How’s the mood at the office?”
She shrugged. “Hard to say. It’s not as bad as it was last week, but it’s still gloomy. Work is piling up, and I’m hearing whispers that more people are thinking about leaving. It’s one rumor after another. Yesterday, there was a rumor that the firm was close to settling the whole thing – with all the plaintiffs – but that’s probably just wishful thinking. If you read the EEOC complaints, Ken was a lot worse than even I thought he was.”
“Did you ever tell your parents about him?”
“Not a chance. If my dad had known, he would have gone berserk. Latino blood can run as hot as yours sometimes.”
“Then you probably did the right thing by not telling him.”
“Maybe. But you didn’t do anything.”
“You’re not my daughter.”
She laughed. “He’s still not so sure about you. Because of your past, I mean.”
“Okay.”
“And also because of your present persona.”
“Okay.”
“He even has this crazy idea that you were the one who was stalking me.”
“Why would he think that?”
“Because he thinks he saw your car in the neighborhood when he was out walking the dog yesterday morning. I know he’s worried about me, but sometimes he can get a little carried away.”
As can I.
CHAPTER 20
Maria
Maria kissed Colin good-bye on his doorstep; though he’d offered to follow her to the office as he had all week, she told him that she’d be fine and to go on and head to his classes. In the instant she’d said it, she’d believed it, but as she drove to work she nonetheless found herself wondering whether Lester might be following her. For the first time since she’d moved from Charlotte, she felt her heart beginning to race for no reason whatsoever. Within seconds, it became harder to breathe and her vision began to narrow.
Instinct took over and she was somehow able to pull the car to the side of the road, feeling her body suddenly go haywire.
Tightness in her chest.
Oh my God…
This wasn’t normal.
She couldn’t breathe.
Her vision continued to narrow and her thoughts began to slip.
She was having a heart attack and needed an ambulance.
She was going to die on the side of the road.
Her phone began to ring, but she only vaguely heard it sound half a dozen times before it went silent. It dinged a moment later, someone texting.
The muscles in her chest tightened.
She couldn’t get enough air.
Her heart continued to pound and terror set in, feeding on the knowledge that she was going to die.
She rested her head against the steering wheel, waiting for the end.
But it didn’t come.
Instead, she simply continued to die little by little over the next few minutes, until she was no longer dying at all.
In time, she was able to lift her head from the steering wheel. Her breathing eased and her peripheral vision was returning. Her heart still pounded, but it felt less intense.
A few minutes later, she began to feel better. Still shaky, but better, and though it seemed impossible, she understood that she hadn’t been having a heart attack.
Instead, she knew her panic attacks had returned.
It was another half hour before she felt completely normal, and by then she was already in her office. Barney wasn’t around, but he’d left a new matter for her – the regional hospital was being sued by a family over an infection called pseudomonas that had eventually led to a patient’s death – along with a hastily scrawled note asking her to get started on finding the appropriate legal decisions necessary to bolster their defense.
She was pondering the entry point for her research when her cell phone rang. She glanced at it, then looked closer, making sure she hadn’t been mistaken. Serena?
She pressed the button, connecting the call. “Hey,” she said, “what’s up?”
“Are you okay?”
“Why?”
“I called earlier but you didn’t answer,” Serena chirped.
“Sorry,” Maria said, thinking back on the panic attack. “I was in the car.” The truth, even if it wasn’t the whole truth. She wondered what Colin would think about that.