Gradually she became aware of the fact that her skin was wrinkled from the constant water stream, that her hair was stuck to her cheek and neck in saturated hunks, and that her calf was in spasms from being forced to tense repeatedly.
But she didn’t care one whit. She was just going to lie there against that tile for the rest of her life.
Or until Elec moved, which he rather unfortunately did before she was ready. When he backed up, she was certain she was going to drop to the floor and get a closer view of her less than stellar housekeeping, but Elec startled her by sliding a hand under her thighs and picking her up.
“Ack!” she said, flapping her arms around with zero grace as she struggled to find her balance. “What are you doing?”
“I’m ready to go to the bed now.”
“What are we going to do there?” she asked. He couldn’t possibility be capable of a repeat performance so soon, and there was no way that she could be touched by finger, tongue, or penis without leaping ten feet in the air. All that water and all those orgasms had left her hypersensitive and she suspected it would just be downright painful if he tried anything.
But she kept all those thoughts to herself, because she tended to be a worrier, and maybe for once, she should sit back and see how it all played out.
Elec shot her an intense look. “We’re going to do whatever you want.” He stepped out of the shower and walked across the bathroom.
She couldn’t believe he was carrying her so easily. That was incredibly sexy, but she was still enough of a priss that she heard herself say, “Don’t we need a towel?” They were dripping a whole heck of a lot of water all over her ceramic tile. The carpet would be even worse.
“No. The bed will dry us off. And what it doesn’t dry on you, I’ll lick dry.”
“Oh.” My. Goodness. Did that mean she was supposed to lick him in kind? Because while it sounded shocking, she thought she could get into a thorough exploration of that hard body.
In the bedroom, Elec set her down on top of her fluffy white down duvet, and didn’t drop her or look like he was gasping for air. Tamara grabbed the pillow and plopped it down over her stomach and various other important parts. She couldn’t help it, it was just instinctive, and she still wasn’t comfortable with giving him a big old look-see in the bright afternoon light.
Elec made a sound of impatience. “Move the pillow,” he said.
“No.”
“Don’t you trust me?”
He almost sounded wounded and that relaxed her enough to release some of the tension in her shoulders. “Of course I do.”
“Then why won’t you let me see you?”
“This is my problem, not yours, Elec. It has nothing to do with me not trusting you. I just need time to get over it.”
“I can be patient.”
“Thanks.” Tamara sucked in a breath, gathered all her courage, and tossed the pillow off.
“Is that better? Are you happy?”
Elec ran his finger down her cheek as he leaned over the bed. “I’ll be happy when you can walk across the room naked in front of me and not even think about it. I’ll be happy when you finally believe that I think you’re beautiful, every inch of you.”
“It may take a while for that,” she told him with all honesty.
Elec climbed onto the bed and settled in beside her. He pulled her so that they were spooning, her backside resting against his stomach. His hand rested on her hip and his lips brushed her temple.
“What did he tell you about your body?” Elec asked softly.
“What? Who?” she asked, startled.
“Your husband. What did he say about the stretch marks, about your br**sts?”
Tamara swallowed hard, fighting the urge to suddenly cry. She had no idea why she would be tearing up, but Elec was being so gentle and understanding with her that it was overwhelming her. “Pete wasn’t a mean guy.”
“I never said he was. But maybe he was insensitive in that he never reassured you that you looked just as good after the babies as you did before.”
“No, he never told me that.” Tamara closed her eyes. “He’d joke that he guessed he wouldn’t be looking all that hot after pushing out a couple of basketballs either. And he’d tease me that it was all good—that he had mental airbrush.”
“Those are really shitty things to say.” Elec had stiffened behind her, and he sounded quietly angry.
“Yeah, they are. But to be fair, I never told him those things upset me. Maybe at the time I didn’t realize how much they did. It was when I decided I was ready to maybe start dating again, that I realized how awful I feel about how I look naked.”
“I guess that’s a lot of years of worry facing you all at once, isn’t it?”
It definitely was. “I do appreciate how wonderful you’ve been, Elec. You’ve said all the right things.”
“I haven’t said anything that wasn’t true.”
Tamara relaxed onto her pillow. “My hair is soaking wet.”
“It will dry.”
“You going to lick it?” she asked with a laugh.
“No, that only applies to skin. Which I’ll get to in a minute. Right now just lying here feels good.”
It did. It was another reminder of how much she had missed the constant closeness of being in a relationship, the right to touch someone casually or intimately, the ability to rest her head on a man’s shoulder or chest and know it was welcome, that she belonged there. It would be dangerous to enjoy those things too much with Elec because she didn’t want to be devastated when she had to give them up, and she would eventually. Either when their relationship became too complicated from time constraints on both their parts, from media and family responsibilities, or when Elec figured out that a twenty-five-year-old hottie had more options available to him than a thirty-two-year-old widow with a couple of kids.
“It would feel even better with a blanket over us. The air-conditioning is cold.”
Elec touched her hard nipple.
She jumped. “Hey!”
“Wow, you are cold.”
Tamara couldn’t help but laugh. That was such a guy thing to do.
Elec reached down and yanked the duvet up, folding it in half over them.
It only came to her waist, but it helped and she gave a yawn. “I’m tired.”
“Me, too.” Elec shifted his hand from her hip to her stomach and gave his own yawn in her ear.
The spot he was touching was her major jiggle spot, and Tamara felt herself tense, felt something akin to a panic attack that he would be residing right on top of her major flaw, and that with his hand there, there was no hiding it. But it clearly wasn’t bothering him, and she needed to get a grip, let it go. Closing her eyes, she used the technique of relaxing from her head down to her toes, one muscle group at a time. By the time she reached her feet, Elec was asleep, his even breathing rushing past her ear.