Richard said, "Stop it, both of you. He isn't a doll."
"He isn't alive, either," I said.
"He deserves better than this," Richard said.
I agreed. I turned to Jean-Claude. "He's mine, Jean-Claude. They're all mine. When night falls, they will be yours again, but their empty shells are mine." I stepped close to him, and that swirl of power lashed out.
He took a hissing breath and backed up. Holding his hand as if I'd struck him.
"Never forget what I am and what I can do. No more threats between us, ever, or it will be the last threat."
He stared at me, and for just a second, there was a flash of something I hadn't seen before: fear. Fear of me for the first time. Good.
Willie stared at me with empty, waiting eyes. He was dead, well and truly dead. Tears flowed down my face, tight and hard. Poor Willie, poor me. He wasn't human. All these months of being his friend and he was dead. Just dead. Damn.
"What happened to the first vampire you raised, ma petite? Why didn't you put it back into its coffin?" A thought slid behind his eyes. I watched the idea form, and fall from his lips. "How did Monsieur Bouvier get the lower half of his body melted away?"
Magnus Bouvier had been Serephina's mortal servant. It had been his job to keep me near Serephina's coffin until she rose to finish me off. I scrubbed at my face, trying to get rid of the tears. Always ruins the effect when you cry. "You know the answer," I said. My voice sounded strained and small.
"Say it aloud, ma petite, let me hear it from your own lips."
"I feel like I'm missing part of this conversation," Richard said, "What are you two talking about?"
"Tell him, ma petite."
"The vampire grabbed Magnus around the waist and held on. I'd planned on it slowing him down, nothing else. I got to the door and ran outside. The sunlight hit the vampire and it burst into flames. I expected Magnus to go back inside, but he didn't. He kept coming, dragging her into the light." Saying it fast didn't make it any better.
I stood in the middle of the dead I had called, hugging myself. I still had dreams about Serephina. Still saw Magnus reaching out to me, begging me to save him. I could have shot him and never lost a moment's sleep, but burning him alive was torture. I didn't do torture. Not to mention that Ellie Quinlan had already risen as a vampire, which made her legally alive. I'd killed them both, and it hadn't been pretty.
Richard was looking at me, a look of something close to horror on his face. "You burned the man and the vampire alive?" I watched the brown in his eyes swim back to the surface. The entire shape of the eye changed while I watched. It looked almost like it should hurt. If it did hurt, he never showed it.
"I didn't plan it, Richard. I didn't want it to happen, but I would have done anything to escape Serephina. Anything."
"I don't understand that."
"I know," I said.
"There is no shame in surviving, ma petite." I turned to Jean-Claude. There was no shock on his face. It was lovely and unreadable as a doll's.
"Then why can't I read your face right now?"
Life flowed back into his face, filled his eyes, moved behind his skin until he was there, staring at me. The look in his eyes wasn't what I expected. Fear was still there and surprise, but underneath was worry.
"Better?" he asked.
"Yes." I frowned. "What's worrying you?"
He sighed. "All honesty is eventually punished, but not usually this quickly."
"Answer me, Jean-Claude."
His eyes went past me to the werewolves waiting at Richard's back. "No one must speak of what has happened here, not to anyone."
"Why not?" Richard asked.
"It would embarrass ma petite."
"That's true," I said, "but that's not what you mean. You don't mind embarrassing me. Hell, this story would make a great threat for all your vampires. It'd scare the hell out of them."
"That, ma petite, is the point."
I sighed. "Stop being obtuse and just tell us."
"I do not want this," he waved at the vampires, "coming to the attention of the vampire council."
"Why not?" Richard and I asked together.
"Put simply, ma petite, they will kill you."
"I'm your registered human servant," I said, "you said you did that to keep me safe."
"For this they will come and see for themselves, ma petite. Whoever they send will know instantly that you do not bear my marks. You are my servant in name only. That will not be enough for them. Without any binding between us, they will not trust you."
"So they'll kill her, just like that?" Richard asked. He moved closer to me as if he'd touch me, but his hands hesitated above my shoulders.
Without looking at him, I said, "One story about burning people alive and you don't want to touch me. You prejudiced little werewolf, you." I tried to keep my voice light but a harsh edge crept in.
His hands gripped my shoulders tightly. "It really bothers you, what you did, doesn't it?"
I turned to see his face, his hands still on my shoulders. "Of course it bothers me. I didn't just kill Magnus, I tortured him to death. Ellie Quinlan didn't deserve to be burned alive." I shook my head and tried to step away from him. He slid his arms across my back, holding me gently against him.
"I'm sorry you had to do it." He touched my hair with one hand, the other still against my back. "Your eyes are haunted by it, by what you did. Don't take this wrong, but it makes me feel better to see that pain in your eyes."
I pushed away from him. "Did you think I could kill someone by torture and feel nothing?"
He met my eyes but it seemed like it was an effort. "I wasn't sure."
I shook my head.
Jean-Claude took my left hand; the other was still holding the Firestar. He turned me to face him. He raised my hand towards his lips as he bowed slowly towards me. He spoke as he moved, "There is nothing that you could ever do that would make me not desire the touch of your body." He kissed my hand. His lips lingered a little longer than was polite. His tongue licked across my skin, and I pulled away.
"It scares you that I can raise vampires like this."
"Perhaps, ma petite, but I have frightened you for years and yet you are still here."
He had a point. I stared at Willie. "Let's see if we can put everyone back where they belong." I hoped I could do it. I wanted Willie back, even if it was only a lie. He walked, he talked, it was still Willie. Or maybe, I just wanted it to be Willie. Maybe I needed it to be Willie.
29
"Take me to the coffin room," I said.
"Why?" Jean-Claude asked. There was something in the way he said that one word that made me stare at him.
"Because I asked."
"How would my flock feel if I allowed the Executioner to enter their private chamber while they slept helpless?"
"I'm not going to kill anybody today, not on purpose."
"I do not like the way you said that, ma petite."
"Uncontrolled power is unpredictable, Jean-Claude. All sorts of unpleasant things can happen. I need to see where the vampires will be resting. I want to try and put them back in a controlled manner."
"What sorts of unpleasant things?" Richard asked.
It was a good question. Since I was pretty much flying blind, I didn't have a good answer. "It takes less power to put back than it does to raise. If we just call it up wild and try to will them back..." I shook my head.
"You could extinguish their life force," Cassandra said.
I looked at her. "What did you say?"
"You're going to put them back in their coffins as you would a zombie, but with a zombie you will it to be dead again, correct?"
I hadn't really thought of it that way, but she was right.
"If you will the vampires back in their coffins, you're in effect willing them dead again like a zombie, right?"
"Yeah."
"But you don't want them permanently dead."
My head was beginning to hurt. "No, I don't want them permanently dead."
"How do you know so very much about necromancy, Cassandra?" Jean-Claude asked.
"I have a master's degree in magical theory."
"That must be useful on a resume," I said.
"Not in the least," she said, "but it might be useful now."