"Which one was Lisa? The blonde?"
Phineas frowned, considering. "I think so. Or she could be the brunette." He shrugged. "It doesn't matter. The Love Doctor is an equal opportunity babe magnet, and one hot babe is just as bootie-licious as another."
Phil snorted. "One day you'll eat those words." He pictured Vanda in his mind. "One day you'll meet someone special, someone who can cut you off at the knees with a simple smile. Someone who can capture your very soul with just one glance of her beautiful eyes. And in one fell moment your entire world will tilt on its axis to point only at her. And you'll know you have met your fate."
Crash.
Phil jerked back as Phineas's glass shattered on the floor, shards glittering in a pool of Blissky. The young Vamp's hand was frozen in the air. He looked stunned.
"Phineas?" Phil touched his shoulder. "Are you all right?"
He remained stiff, his eyes wide-open and unblinking.
"Phineas." Phil shook him, but it had no effect. The young Vamp seemed completely paralyzed.
Nightshade? For a shocked second Phil wondered if someone had slipped the paralyzing drug into Phineas's drink. Was there a Malcontent lurking in their midst? But no, it couldn't be Nightshade. That would have made Phineas fall on the floor before paralysis set in.
"Who?" Phineas whispered so faintly Phil wasn't sure he'd heard it. This was a good sign, though. If Phineas had been dosed with Nightshade, he wouldn't be able to talk.
"Who...who is she?" Phineas whispered.
Phil followed the Vamp's line of vision. The dance floor.
There were several couples on the dance floor. Shanna was dancing with her husband. Jean-Luc was dancing with Heather. Gregori was dancing with the fashion model, Inga. And Jack was dancing with..."LaToya? The girl in the red dress?"
"La...LaToya?" Phineas stared at her.
"She's Lara's roommate."
"She's a goddess."
"She's the maid of honor."
"She's an angel," Phineas breathed.
"She's a police officer."
Phineas blinked. A shudder visibly shook him, and he turned to Phil with an appalled expression. "I-I don't do well with the po-po. I have an outstanding warrant."
Phil winced. "That could be a problem."
Phineas's gaze drifted back to LaToya, and his brown eyes widened with a look of awe. He squared his shoulders. "Nothing will stop me." He stepped forward.
When his shoe crunched on glass, Phil pulled him back. "Wait a minute." He motioned to a waiter to clean up the mess.
Phineas stiffened suddenly and grasped Phil's arm. "Did you see that? She looked at me!"
Phil glanced at the dance floor, and sure enough, LaToya was checking Phineas out.
"I'm in love," Phineas whispered.
That was fast. Phil suppressed a grin. "What about your date with Lisa?"
"Who?"
"Lisa. The blonde...or brunette. They're both Vamps like you. LaToya's mortal." Even though a lot of male Vamps were falling for mortal women, Phil knew the guys deeply regretted the fact that they would have to turn their wives at some point, or lose them to the ravages of time.
Phineas sighed. "LaToya is La-One. La-angel."
"All right, Pepe LePew, but you haven't actually met her yet."
Phineas stepped back as two waiters approached with a dustpan, pail, and mop. "I'll meet her now." He popped a Vampos into his mouth, then stuffed the roll of mints into his trouser pocket. "I need to act cool, man. Turn up the mojo. Impress her with my savoir faire and debonairness."
He unbuttoned his tuxedo jacket to reveal a bright red cummerbund. "The Love Doctor is in the house. Come on, bro. You can be my assistant. Make me sound good."
"I'll do my best." Phil accompanied the young black Vamp to the dance floor.
Phineas had one hand pressed to his cummerbund and was suddenly walking like John Wayne.
"What are you doing?" Phil whispered.
"This is my pimp walk. The ladies can't resist it."
"Are you sure that's the right approach to take with a police officer?"
"Oh yeah." Phineas smirked. "It's working, bro. She can't take her eyes off me."
"I'm not sure that's a good thing," Phil muttered.
The music stopped, and Jack spotted them. "Phil, Phineas, how are you? Have you met Lara's friend, LaToya?"
Phil shook her hand. "A pleasure to meet you. And may I introduce Phineas McKinney, a valued member of the MacKay Security and Investigation team."
"And head of the special Malcontent Terrorist Task Force, but I can't discuss that." Phineas waved a dismissive hand. "Top secret stuff, you know."
Jack gave him a wry look. "That is a well kept secret."
LaToya frowned. "Are you for real?"
"Of course." Phineas took LaToya's hand. "Don't worry, sweetness. I won't frighten you with the gruesome details of my missions as super spy, code name Dr. Phang."
"Fang?" LaToya jerked her hand away and leaned close to Jack. "He's a vampire?"
"He's a good Vamp," Jack whispered. "Like me."
"The jury's still out on that," LaToya muttered.
Jack sighed. "And he has excellent hearing."
LaToya turned back to Phineas and huffed when she caught him ogling her. "Don't go looking at my neck, sucker."
"He drinks synthetic blood like the rest of us," Jack said.
Phineas executed a gallant bow. "I could drink in your majestic beauty for an eternity."
"You're not drinking anything from me," LaToya said, then turned back to Jack. "I saw those holes on Lara's neck when she came back from that undercover mission. I didn't realize what it meant at the time, but if you ever do that again - "
"It couldn't be helped," Jack interrupted. "I was posing as a Malcontent, so I had to act like one."
"I'm just warning you." LaToya waved a finger at him. "If I see any more bite marks on my friend, I'm coming after you like a gator on a dead chicken. And you - " She turned to Phineas. "Don't think you can pull any of that super mojo on me. As far as I'm concerned, you're just another dead carcass trussed up in a fancy tuxedo."
"I'm the Love Doctor, sweetness. I've got the cure."
"You're a dead doctor. I don't care how handsome you are. I'm not interested!" LaToya marched off.
Jack winced. "Sorry, old boy. She's a bit sensitive about vampires at the moment."
Phil patted Phineas on the back. "Maybe she'll come around in time."
Phineas smiled slowly. "She said I was handsome. Did you hear that?" He smoothed back his short hair. "Dr. Phang strikes again. The chase is on."
"You should take it slow," Phil warned him, but the Love Doctor took off, following LaToya.
Phil sighed. He couldn't even take his own advice. Now that he knew Vanda was genuinely attracted to him, he was pursuing her as fast as he could. He congratulated Jack, then hurried off to the conference room to make sure Father Andrew was ready.
And then, somehow, he needed to get Vanda there for the meeting.
As it turned out, Vanda didn't need to get in line to meet Jack's fiancée. After she and Maggie retrieved two more glasses of Bubbly Blood, they returned to the corner behind the mortal refreshment table and found Lara there.
Lara filled them in on the wedding plans, then Maggie shared her family photos and described the ranch in Texas. Vanda sat, sipping her Bubbly Blood, while she waited for Phil to return. Not that she was in any hurry to see him. She was still peeved about his snooping around in her past.
Constantine came back, wanting more cookies, so Maggie distracted him with photos of her ranch.
"Can I go?" Tino asked. "I want to ride a horse."
"I would love for you to visit." Maggie gave him a hug. "I'll ask your mom about it."
Lara filled a plate with boiled shrimp, then drizzled some hot sauce on top. "So tell me, Vanda, what do you do for a living?"
"I run a - " She glanced at the little boy. "A dance club."
"Can I go?" Tino asked.
"No," Vanda and Maggie both answered quickly.
"But I like to dance." Tino skipped over to the table to snatch a cookie.
"It's just for adults," Maggie explained, then her eyes widened. "Lara, it would be the perfect place for a bachelorette party."