Unless…that was his normal behavior with his family. The distant one. The quiet one.
Now that she thought about it, it was kind of weird, Carter living on Gemma’s ranch, when the McKays owned tens of thousands of acres. Surely they could’ve found someplace for him to live and work. He had family there. Roots there.
But were those roots strangling him?
His words, I’m nothing like my brothers, echoed in the back of her mind .
Along with, there’s no place for me on the home place.
Even with all his family surrounding him, having a shared history, and a constant connection, did Carter suffer from the same sense of displacement she did?
She never felt displaced when she was with him. She suspected he felt the same. But she hadn’t really been with him tonight, not like she’d wanted. Not like he’d wanted, apparently, since he’d left.
Macie climbed in her car and drove to his place.
The lights were off in his trailer, a glow spilled through the cracks in the wooden slats of the barn.
He was working. Big surprise. He was always working.
Well, the time had come for a little play.
Rather than sneak inside his sanctuary, she shouted, “Carter?”
No answer.
“Carter, are you in there?”
“Macie?”
“Uh. Yeah. Can I come in?”
“No! Shit. Hang on. Just a second.” Unfamiliar shuffling, creaking, and crashing noises sounded, followed by, “It’s clear. You can come in now.”
Macie skirted piles in the darkened walkway and didn’t look up until she’d reached the main portion of the barn.
When she saw Carter, her heart skipped a beat. He looked so…raw. A powerful male, his sweaty chest bared. Ripped sweatpants hanging from his hips, drawing her attention to his ripped abs. His hair was damp and curlier than normal. His lips were full, a little pouty, his jaw rigid, and his eyes…his eyes.
Lord God almighty his eyes were absolutely savage.
She couldn’t think straight.
“Why are you here, Macie?”
The guarded look on his face said he expected her to say I’m here for hot sex, baby cakes, strip.
And seeing him standing there, all tough and masculine and yummy—it was tempting to be flip and reduce this… need to be here for him tonight into nothing more than a physical act. But at some point in the last few days, things between them had gone beyond physical. So, she simply said, “I missed you.”
The energy drink in his hand stopped halfway to his mouth. “What?”
“I missed you.” She took a step toward him. “Surprised?”
“Yeah.”
“Me too. Look. I know you were upset tonight. I don’t know why, and I’m sorry I didn’t notice until right before you left.” Another step. “But I’m here now, in case you want to talk about it or something.”
Carter’s eyes devoured her. Then he threw the drink can over his shoulder and charged. A hand dove into her hair and his mouth slammed down on hers. Hot. Hungry.
Greedy. Achingly familiar.
During the consuming kiss, Carter’s body was plastered against hers, yet as he ate at her mouth, his fingertips softly caressed her face.
She moved her lips a fraction of an inch. “Carter.”
“I’m not done kissing you.” And he absolutely destroyed her with the ferocity of his need. Finally, he gentled his kiss. “I can’t believe you’re here.”
“I can’t believe you left early. I thought you’d be happy that your family was here.”
“I am. But I know my place in the McKay clan.”
“Which is?”
Carter rubbed his cheek along her hairline. “I’m the quiet one.”
She considered that. “I’m the last person who knows anything about family dynamics. But I’m glad you’re not the quiet one with me.”
“Why?”
“I never have to guess how you feel. Granted, I don’t always like it, but you don’t hold back anything.”
“That’s the first time anyone has ever said that to me.”
“It’s true. So tell me what’s wrong.”
Carter sighed. “When I’m with you, I feel like I’m really me. I don’t have anything to prove. You just let me be who I am. That’s not always the case with my family. And tonight, maybe it was childish, but I hated that I couldn’t show them…”
“What?”
“Show them who I am when I’m with you.”
“Oh yeah? A bossy sexual deviant?”
She felt him smile against her temple. “Maybe. But I couldn’t. Then I got really selfish and didn’t want to share you with them either. You’re mine, and I know even sayin’ that is just plain wrong.”
Wrong or not, his words sent a thrill through her. “Since they’re not here, how about if you show me instead? Remind me of who I am when I’m with you.”
“Of my bossy sexual deviance?”
She brushed her lips over his collarbone, tasting sweat and mineral spirits on his hot skin. “If that’s what you want. I didn’t come here for sex, Carter. I just wanted to be here if you needed me.”
His hoarse laugh vibrated on the top of her head. “Oh, I need you, all right.”
“For?”
“Never mind. You’re not here for my sexual deviance, remember?”
“But I am if that’s what you need from me tonight.” She placed another tender kiss on his pec. “Show me who you are with me. I’m yours tonight to do or be whatever you want. You already know I can’t say no to you. I don’t want to say no. When I’m with you, I feel like I’m really me too. Tell me what you want.”
Carter sought her mouth, kissing her, toying with her lips. Then his breath tickled her ear. “What I want? Well, I don’t want to talk; I want to feel. You. Me. Us. Nothing matters beyond what we are together. I want your mouth on me, Macie. I want to see my c**k slippin’ between these sweet, sweet lips. I want to wrap my hands in your hair and feel you suckin’ me deep, suckin’ me hard. And when I can’t stand how good it feels, when I’m about to explode, I wanna come on your tits.”
A flood of moisture burst in her panties. “Oh wow.”
“You rethinkin’ that ‘whatever’ comment?”
“No.” Macie placed her hands on his head. She looked directly into his eyes and repeated, “Whatever you want.”