But my future is the stars. So it doesn’t mean that I don’t still hope.
After a morning of back-to-back classes, I have four syllabi to go over, five chapters of reading, an essay to write, and a page of math problems.
It’s overwhelming and awesome.
I haven’t been this happy since…well, since Logan.
School, I decide, is the best cure for a broken heart. That and a busy schedule. Even though I’m eager to dive into my homework, I’m also thankful I have my work-study job in the bursar’s office to keep me truly occupied. I’m only scheduled for three hours on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, but with my full course heavy with math and science classes, I’m sure it will be all I can handle.
The job is easy, thankfully, and even though it’s my first day at the counter, it only takes half my shift before my supervisor says, “You’ve really got the hang of this, Devi. Think you can handle some students on your own while I start working on the deposit for my drawer?”
“Yep. I’m good.” Like I said, the job is pie, and Jake’s a great trainer.
He’s also amazing to look at—tall, dark, handsome, built, and totally gay. He’s witty and smart and likes to tease, and since there’s no sexual tension, it’s easy to tease back. We’ve only known each other two days, and he’s already a friend.
“Coolio. I’ll be in the back. Holler if you need anything, I’ll be here in a flash.”
I don’t need anything, but I turn my back to the counter and call after him. “Hey, Jake!” When he rushes back, I say, “Just testing.”
He laughs. “You’re such a bad girl.” If he only knew. His expression sombers quickly. “Oh, sorry. Didn’t see you come in,” he says to someone behind me. “Devi will get you taken care of.”
Jake walks off, and I put on a friendly grin and pivot to face the person in front of me. “How can I—” I start, and then my voice cuts off in a sharp intake of breath.
Because the guy in front of me is Logan.
My body reacts instantly, buzzing and itching as if on cue. As if we’re in production for Campus Porn and our script has us meeting and banging within two minutes. I’m ready to start shedding my clothing and I’m not above climbing over the counter.
But we aren’t on set for anything. This is real life, and while I’m thrilled at the sight of him, I’m on pins and needles too.
He locks eyes with mine, a host of familiar emotions present in his intense gaze. “Am I too late?” he asks.
“What?” I ask, even though I heard him. I might even know what he’s asking, but I’m still so stunned to see him that I’ve forgotten how to use words.
“Am I too late?” He glances toward the back office where Jake disappeared just a moment ago.
Damn, he really is asking what I think he’s asking!
And he’s really here. In front of me.
My stomach flutters with nervous exhilaration, and I have to swallow before I can respond. “You mean, are you too late for me? That in the short time I’ve been in Austin I may have fallen madly in love with my supervisor? Because, number one, he’s gay.”
“He’s gay?” Logan tries to play surprised but mostly he sounds relieved.
“Mm hmm.” I lean against the counter to be nearer to him but also because I’m shaking like a leaf.
“Huh.” He leans forward too, his elbows on the counter, and he’s so close I can smell the familiar clean scent of his skin. “What’s number two?”
Number two, I’m still madly in love with you.
I almost say it. We’re flirting, and it’s easy and natural and like we’ve never been apart. But I’m trying to be cautious because what is he doing here?
“Number two, I don’t just give my heart to everyone I work with.” Speaking of my heart, it’s pounding so hard I’m sure he can hear it.
His eyes are back on mine, his gaze deep and penetrating. “I know that about you. It’s one of my favorite traits of yours.”
It’s funny how, out of the hundreds of amazing things he’s said and done to me, a simple statement like this can still twist me in delicious knots. Maybe because a part of me had feared that he hated me after I left. That there would never be anything about me that he thought of as his favorite again.
But he doesn’t hate me. And he’s here. And I’ve missed him so so much that just seeing him makes me all sorts of crazy happy. But if nothing’s changed since I last saw him…“What are you doing here, Logan?” My tone is demanding and I don’t try to hide the bite of desperation. “You come all the way to Austin like this, and I’m going to start to get my hopes up. Is there any reason why maybe I should get my hopes up?”
His eyes fall—nervous maybe? He digs in his back pocket. “I don’t know if it’s worth getting your hopes up over. But as for what I’m doing here,” he pulls out his wallet and flips it open, “I came to pay a tuition bill.”
Understanding settles in, and my heart literally sinks. “I don’t need you to pay my tuition bill, thank you. I’m doing fine on my own.”
I wonder if he talked to my mother or if he just decided to come do this on a whim of his own. I’m not sure how he ever got the notion that I would want this, as if he owed me. As if I were his whore. I’m pissed and my eyes are stinging, and how the hell is it still possible for him to hurt me like this?
But then he says, “Not your tuition, Queen Cass. Mine.”