Dalton made more effort with that blowjob than he ever had in his life. Maybe it was guilt, but he thought there was something more. It excited him to swallow around Tierney as much as it had excited him to make Tierney choke on his dick. The way Tierney squirmed under him and arched up when Dalton wormed his thumb under Tierney’s balls and massaged his taint was as powerful as holding Tierney’s head between his hands had been.
When Tierney clutched Dalton’s hair and thrust into his mouth, crying out as he came, Dalton was rubbing his own cock into the lamb’s wool rug, reaching for himself with his hand.
I want him to fuck me.
That thought killed his desire. As he swallowed the last of Tierney’s cum, the magic of the moment drained away.
He flopped onto his back, panting, listening to Tierney breathe in counterpoint. Out of sync with him. Dalton closed his eyes and scrubbed his hands up and down his face, trying to avoid reality for a few minutes more. But it reasserted itself, of course. Reality was such a pushy bitch.
He needed a high level of trust to let someone top him. And Tierney couldn’t meet that bar. Oh, he might be sincere and even reliable in his way, but the second something threatened his closet, he’d throw Dalton and whoever else was in the road under the bus.
Dalton groaned.
Then Tierney made it all worse. “I’m sorry,” he said quietly.
Oh God, so am I.
For the first minute after he came, Tierney was euphoric. But then Dalton pushed away from him and moaned. Tierney peeked, and the dude’s dick was out but pretty much soft, so that wasn’t the problem. He averted his eyes, inspecting his ceiling. He wanted to shift, because the edge of the rug was digging into his back, but for some reason he was afraid to move. Afraid to draw attention to himself.
Dalton was so quiet. Christ, he had done something wrong, hadn’t he? “I’m sorry.”
“What do you have to be sorry for?” Dalton asked, but Tierney could hear the edge in the dude’s voice that told him he definitely needed to apologize.
He just didn’t have a clue why. “I don’t know,” he said. “There’s usually something I did.”
Dalton sighed heavily. “So, how was it?”
“Good.” Amazing. Enlightening. So much better than an anonymous blowjob, forget giving one . . .
“Yeah, it was good,” Dalton agreed, which meant Tierney could breathe again. And he didn’t have to suffer the embarrassment of asking if he’d done all right.
“Really?” he squeaked. Seriously? Way to humiliate yourself, dude.
“Really,” Dalton said. “I can’t believe that was your first time.” He sat up, back to Tierney, moving around like he was tucking his dick away behind his fly.
“I, um, I paid attention in class, I guess.” Tierney started on his jeans, pulling them up his hips, trying not to make any noise. Why?
Dalton froze. “What?”
God, he was an unmitigated dork, wasn’t he? Tierney squeezed his eyes shut and tried to explain. “When guys would blow me, I, like, noted what felt good. In case I ever got a chance to use—”
“You’ve been blown before, but you never blew anyone? How’d you get away with that?”
“Well, I mean, that’s the way it works at glory holes, right?”
Dalton moved all at once, scrambling on the floor. Tierney swallowed and opened his eyes to find the guy gape mouthed, staring at him.
“Glory holes?”
Tierney’s chest tightened up, restricting his lungs. “I mean, either you’re on your knees on one side, or you’re standing with your dick out on the other. No one ever asked me to blow them after . . .”
Dalton had covered his face with his hands, shaking his head. “I cannot believe we didn’t use a condom.”
Tierney jackknifed up. “I’ve always used one, I swear. I mean, at least since college. Even with women. And I get tested yearly as part of my physical and I’m disease-free.”
Dalton groaned, then half laughed, lifting his head to pin Tierney with a look. “Any other risky behaviors you want to tell me about now that I blew you?”
“I’m sorry.” It was Tierney’s turn to scramble and tuck himself in. He stood up as soon as he could without flopping around. “I asked you if you wanted a condom.”
“You didn’t tell me I needed it,” Dalton snapped, tossing his bangs back before getting on his feet too. “You said you’d never done that before.”
“I meant I’ve never suc—”
“I get it.” Dalton held up his palm. “But since they don’t cover blowjob etiquette at glory holes—in the future? You need to tell your partners they have to use a condom.” He planted his hands on his hips, glaring.
Tierney swallowed, trying to keep a clear head. Trying not to freak. But his stomach felt like a toilet bowl, swirly and gross, and the inmates were clanging on the bars of their cells. As a “first” sexual experience—his first time with a guy he actually knew—this blew chunks.
I want to be held, one of the inmates whined. Tierney threw that fucker into solitary confinement. “Hey man, I figured since you were willing to let a guy you barely like touch your dick, you were okay with some risk.”
Dalton dropped his hands. “What do you mean, ‘barely like’? If I didn’t like you, I wouldn’t be here.”
Bullshit. “It is a game for you, isn’t it, dude? You get off on fucking with guys’ heads? Tell them you don’t want sex, you just want to ‘help,’ then wait until they’re drunk and, I don’t know, bestow pity fucks on them? You got kind of rough there, at the end. Did you like shoving your dick down my throat?”
Dalton blanched, but Tierney barely noticed. His head was throbbing, and the whole room was pulsing in his vision. Anger. Anger was such a pure emotion. If he was angry, he couldn’t feel humiliated.
“You know what? I’m not going to be your pet project. I fucked up.” He threw his hands in the air. “I shouldn’t have trusted you.” He turned away and paced the two steps to the coffee table. His bourbon was right there, waiting for him. May as well drown his sorrows because his life just got a whole lot shittier. He sneered at the cap when it wouldn’t come off right away. Fucking thing was resisting him. Dalton’s footsteps came up behind him just as the lid fell, bouncing on the floor. Then Dalton laid his fingers on his shoulder.