He had his family in his arms, and there was simply no way he would lose them now.
The ride back to the ranch was quiet and Maggie was grateful.
There were too many thoughts whirling through her mind for her to be able to hold any kind of rational conversation. Behind her in his car seat, Jonas slept fretfully. Soft whimpers and sighs drifted to her, and she turned in her seat to look at him, needing to reassure herself that he was safe. And healthy.
When she faced the front again, she took a moment to study Justice’s profile in the muted light from the dashboard. His eyes were fixed on the road ahead of them. His mouth was firm and tight, his jaw clenched as if he, too, were having trouble relaxing from the scare they’d had. In the shadows he looked fierce and proud and untouchable.
But the memory of his arms coming around her, holding her and the baby, was so strong and fresh in her mind that she knew he was right now hiding his emotions from her. Which was probably just as well, she thought. Now that they were back on solid ground, now that they knew Jonas was fine, everything would return to the way it was. The way it had to be.
God, she could still hear him at the dance. We’ll get married. Did he actually think that she would stay with him just because Jonas was his son? Or because he knew now that he could give her more children? Didn’t he see that a marriage for the sake of the children was a mistake for everyone involved?
She blew out a breath as Justice steered the car down the long drive to the ranch house. Before he’d even turned off the engine, the front door flew open and a wide slice of lamplight cut into the darkness. Mrs. Carey stood on the threshold, wearing a floor-length terry cloth robe, fisted in one hand at her neck.
“Thank goodness, you’re back. He’s really all right?” she called out. “I’ve been so worried.”
Maggie stepped out of the car. “He’s fine, Mrs. Carey.”
“Go on to bed,” Justice added as he came around the front of the car. “We’ll talk in the morning.”
The older woman nodded and turned for the stairs, leaving the front door open with the lamplight shining like a path in the darkness.
Maggie went to the backseat, opened the door and deftly undid the straps holding Jonas in his car seat. He stirred a little, but as soon as his head was nestled onto his mother’s shoulder, he went back to sleep. Having her child cuddled in close gave Maggie the strength she was going to need when she spoke to Justice. So she held on to Jonas as if he were a talisman as they headed for the house.
Once inside, Justice closed the door and silence descended on them. It had been one of the longest nights of Maggie’s life—and it wasn’t over yet. She couldn’t wait until morning to say what had to be said. She didn’t know if she’d find the will to have this conversation in the morning; by then, she might have talked herself out of it, and she couldn’t allow that to happen no matter how her heart was breaking.
“Quite a night,” Justice said, splintering the quiet with his deep, rumbling voice.
“Yes, it was.” She turned her gaze up to his and stared into those dark blue eyes for a long moment. God, how she would miss him. Say it now, Maggie, she told herself firmly. Do it and get it over with. “Justice…”
He watched her, waiting, and she could see by his rigid stance that he wasn’t expecting good news.
“I’m going to be leaving tomorrow,” she said, the words bursting from her in a determined rush.
“What?” He took a step toward her, but Maggie backed up, stroking one hand up and down Jonas’s spine. “Why?”
“You know why,” she said sadly, feeling the sudden sting of tears. She blinked them back, desperate to at least complete this last part of their marriage with a little dignity. “Your leg’s nearly healed. You don’t need me, Justice, and it’s time I actually moved on with my life.”
“Move on?” He shook his head, ground his teeth together and said, “Now you want to move on? Now when we know I’m Jonas’s father? Now that we can have the big family you always wanted?”
“It’s not about that,” she said with a sigh.
“I signed those divorce papers a hell of a long time ago, Maggie, but you never filed them. Why?”
She shook her head now. “You know why.”
“Because you love me.”
“Yes, all right?” She raised her voice and immediately regretted it when Jonas stirred against her. Hushing him, Maggie lowered her voice again and said, “I did. Still do. But when I go home, I’m finally going to file those divorce papers, Justice.”
“Why now?” He stared at her, his features shadowed by the overhead light.
“Because I’m not going to stay married to you for the sake of our son,” she told him, willing him to understand. “It wouldn’t be right for any of us. Don’t you see, Justice? I love you, but I need to be loved in return. I want to be needed. I want a man to share Jonas’s life with me. I want a man who’ll stand beside me—”
“Like I did tonight, you mean?”
“Yes,” she said quickly, breathlessly. “Like you did tonight. But, Justice, that’s not who you are normally. You don’t let people in. You don’t let yourself need anyone.” She blew out a breath, bit down on her trembling lower lip and said, “You’d rather be right than be in love. Your pride is more important to you than anything or anyone. And I can’t live like that. I won’t.”
She turned for the stairs, her heart heavy, her soul empty. She picked up the hem of her dress, took one step and was stopped by a single word from Justice.
“Please.”
Stunned to her core, Maggie slowly turned to look at him. He stood alone in the entryway, a solitary man in the shadows though he stood beneath an overhead light. There was hunger in his eyes and a taut, uncomfortable expression on his face.
She’d almost convinced herself she had imagined him speaking when he said again, louder this time, “Please stay.”
Maggie swayed in place, shocked by his words, astonished that he would swallow his pride and so damn hopeful she nearly couldn’t breathe. “Justice? I don’t think I’ve ever heard you say that before.”
“You haven’t.” Justice went to her then, desperate to make her hear him. Make her understand everything he’d learned in the past few hours. It had been coming on for days, he knew, but the time spent in that emergency room, sharing their fears, standing beside her, wanting to take on the world to help his son, had coalesced everything into a very clear vision.