He was with the love of his life, so I shouldn’t keep thinking of him that way, even if he had sent me a text message stating he missed me. Besides, Luciana had a point. I had always wondered what it was like to be free, have fun and date as much as I liked without anyone or anything to stop me. So here was my chance.
This stranger before me was my first conquest to be. Thinking of Callum and how much I loved him wouldn’t help me move forward. All he wanted from me was sex. So acting all sentimental was downright bad for me.
I gave the stranger a knowing smile before I downed my drink. I was single, wasn’t I? “That’s up for you to decide.” The stranger hid back a smile, which made me even bolder. “Do you have a name, stranger?” I cocked up a brow, loving this new me; fun, flirty, fabulous and f**kable? Ha!
“Let’s make a deal. Sit with me, talk to me, drink with me and I will tell you everything you want.” He didn’t bat an eyelash. “Everything you want.”
Hell. I think this was the first man that had made me feel something after Callum. I was definitely interested now. Looking at him through my lashes, I bit my lip and made a decision in my head. “Lychee.”
“Excuse me?”
I smirked and dangled the empty martini glass. “It’s empty. Get me another lychee martini. I’ll be over at your table.” I noted how his eyes burned into my skin. “Don’t be long. I don’t like waiting.” Waving him goodbye, I strutted towards where his table was situated, knowing that the stranger was watching me.
“Well aren’t you a sight for sore eyes!”
I’d know that voice anywhere.
Fuck.
Me.
Hard.
Breathe calmly and deeply before you face him, I reminded myself internally. After a few seconds with my fakest smile in place, I spun around and greeted him. “Fancy seeing you here, Callum.” My fake smile faltered when I saw his face. He looked as though he was about to strangle me or kill me on the spot. Either way, Callum had danger about him that easily gave off the would-definitely-inflict-harm-at-a-moment’s-chance kind of vibe.
“It’s a surprise, really. I think you forgot to mention that you fancied being a hooker.”
Normally, I would be insulted given that this was Callum who was treating me like a complete tool… however I was the new quadruple F’s Stella, alcohol infused. “If you want to make a reservation, I’m all fully booked until the end of the year. Try calling me the day after New Year’s, I might slot you in.” With a smile, I left him there, looking like he was about to shake with rage. He had been rude, condescending and totally out of line.
Now seated in one of the red leather booths, I looked anywhere except where he had been. I didn’t want to chance getting a glimpse of him again because it f**king hurt. If I saw Zara as well, I might just end up crying and hiding in the loo.
When the stranger came back with my drink, the bubble of excitement that I’d had earlier seemed to have fizzled. Realizing that made it quite depressing. With a deep sigh, I took hold of my drink and gulped half it down without even wincing at the strong burn of the vodka. My stomach was on fire and I liked it. It made me feel something other than the pain in my chest.
The stranger kept asking mundane questions; how old I was, what did I do for a living, blah blah blah and blah.
I wasn’t trying to be rude after the poor bloke had gone to fetch me another tini, but my ears were bleeding and I needed to get away. As usual, I had to use the same excuse all women used as a top-secret code and that was the bathroom.
Seeing Callum had made everything come crashing down again. The immediate assault of pain and longing was now in full effect. Memories of him bombarded me and I was having a hard time shaking his ghost away.
Pushing the dark door to enter the loo, I strode past the women who were busy redoing their make-up and talking about men as sex tips that were randomly flung about. I went all the way to the last cubicle, topped the lid of the toilet seat and wiped it down with an anti-bacterial cloth before I plopped my sad bottom on it.
Tears formed in my eyes and I immediately wiped them away with a tissue. I kept telling myself to stop being such a pathetic woman, hiding away in a loo at a blasted club.
I was having a lot of fun, truly. That was, until Callum had decided to ruin my night by appearing out of nowhere. Why did he feel the need to mess with my head so much? Hadn’t I been gracious enough to let him go and be with his Zara? Any woman who was in my shoes would have thrown one hell of a tantrum before walking out of his life, most especially after how possessive he’d been a few days before it had happened. I didn’t do any of that, though, because I cared for him. Most of all, I respected him as a man, a man who had lost someone extremely significant in his life. Zara’s actions caused Callum so much pain and resentment. I wanted for him to have a chance at being happy again.
I was taught to love and to do so with my all, that sacrificing yourself to make the people you love happy was the best thing you could do to show affection. Setting him free was a tough choice to make; yet I had done it because I had felt his pain and agony. He was trapped in his dark misery… and I wanted it gone. I’d rather see myself crying like I was right now than see him twisted with pain.
Yes, I loved him enough to become a selfless woman. I was dealing with it still; the after effects of losing him. So it was truly hard when he toyed with me because I could only endure so much before I started faltering and my selfishness would get the best of me.
He was Zara’s. I had come to accept that.
Wiping my eyes dry for the last time, I rummaged through my clutch purse for some eye drops. Yes, I had them handy because my red eyes weren’t meshing with the look I was going for. They’d been a staple in my purse ever since I had walked out of his house. The sad thing about having a broken heart was that it always showed. It was either you lose or gain weight, sported red puffy eyes, dark circles from insomnia, or a defeated sad face that never seemed to go away even when you smile. I mean, it was truly ridiculous.
Okay, I’d had enough of feeling like shit. I pushed myself to gather my bearings and walk out of there. I wouldn’t let Callum, or any man for that matter; ruin this first night of my trial run in singledom.
Letting myself out of the cubicle, I strode out whilst fixing my skirt, making sure the back part wasn’t hanging or anything. The last thing I needed was to be flashing people my arse. A small, wicked smile formed at my lips when I thought about people’s reactions, but when I looked up, I was startled to find Callum lounging against the sink, still looking like he was out to gut me alive.