“Sounds good.”
Ten minutes later, we were almost halfway to my place. Traffic was really bad, worse than usual. “You’re quiet. Are you okay?”
“I’m all right. It’s just a lot to deal with all at once. New job. I caught some kind of bug, the flu, maybe. And now the car.”
“Aw hon. Things will turn around. I promise. It has to be extra hard at the new job if you’re seeing Shane a lot.” Jill looked over her shoulder then steered her car into a tiny opening between two SUV’s going a little faster in the left lane. Of course, once we got in the lane, everyone in front of us stomped on their brakes.
I sighed. Loud. And long. “I don’t see him a lot. But I have seen every day since I started.”
“Is he being a dick?”
“No. Not at all. I talked to him today for just a few minutes. We were in the elevator.”
Jill’s eyes bugged. “Oh, that had to be hell.”
“It was.”
“What did he say?” Up ahead, the light turned red, and she hit the brakes. Once she had the car stopped, she flicked me a tell-me look.
I couldn’t tell her everything. She would go on a rampage, saying what a jerk he was, and warning me not to let him make me change my mind. “He asked me if I like my new job.”
Her eyes narrowed. She was too freaking perceptive. “What else?”
“Not much,” I lied. “I tried not to speak to him.”
Her squinty eyes became squintier. “There’s more. There has to be. What is it? What aren’t you telling me?”
Dammit. She was like a hound on the trail of a rabbit. There was no way I could get out of this. “He told me he loves me,” I mumbled.
“Oh God. You aren’t thinking about going back—“
“No.” I pointed at the light, which was now green. “Jill. The light.”
She hit the gas and her zoomy little car accelerated. “Maybe it isn’t such a good idea for you to work for his company.”
“It’s the only job I’ve been able to find.”
“I get that. You need a job. But you need to stay away from him. It’s like you’re addicted to him.”
My heart started pounding. She was wrong. I wasn’t a pathetic pining little sap. I had developed real feelings for Shane. Deep ones. She needed to respect that. “I’m not addicted, Jill. I love Shane. Like I’ve never loved a guy before. I hurt inside. All the time, especially when I see him.”
“That’s not love. You don’t love him. You want him. No, I take that back. You are in love with the idea of loving him. You don’t actually love him, not the real man, the flawed one with all the baggage. He is incapable of loving you back.”
“But he said—“
“He’s playing with your head. That bastard.” This time when she glanced my way, I let her see how hurt I was feeling. Her expression softened instantly. “I’m going to put out some feelers, see if I can get any leads to another job. You need to sever all ties to that man, or you’re never going to get over him. I can’t sit by and watch you pine away for a married man.”
Married man.
My insides clenched.
She’d said that with such conviction. Had she learned something already? “Is he, Jill? Is he married?”
“Oh, I don’t know for sure yet. My guy hasn’t been able to confirm it. But I tend to believe the rumors. Marriage between people from different countries is complicated, especially people with money.”
My insides did a flip-flop then a twist.
It was possible. Shane might be married.
How many times had he tried to warn me, that he was bad for me? All along I’d thought it was because of the domination and submission stuff or his possessiveness. Could there have been another reason why he’d tried to push me away so many times? Had this been the reason why he’d walked out of my condo and hadn’t called me? Did he feel guilty?
As Jill pulled up to my condo, she turned to me and promised, “I’m going to make some calls tonight. As soon as I leave. The sooner you’re out of that place--and out of his reach--the better.”
Chapter 7
The next day my world collapsed. Every planet in every dimension must have been aligned, because I’d never had so many things go wrong all at once. My car needed hundreds of dollars in repairs. Hundreds of dollars I didn’t have (I was going to have to borrow the cash from Jill—which I hated to do). My coffeemaker didn’t work. I had no idea what the problem was with it. And I had to take a cold shower, thanks to the pilot going out on my hot water heater again. The only thing that went right was I managed to get to work on time, thanks to Jill. As promised, she zoomed up in her car twenty minutes before I had to be at work. She dropped me off fifteen minutes later.
Adding insult to injury, when I stepped inside Shane intercepted me no more than a minute after I arrived, cornering me in a hallway. He was big and resolute and sexy. And he was determined to talk to me.
I didn’t fight him.
He escorted me into a small office that appeared to be unused. It was dark. There was a desk, but no papers, no computers, no signs of life. He closed the door.
Then he locked it.
What was he doing?
I looked into his eyes.
Oh no.
My heart started galloping hard and fast.
I needed to do something. Now. Before it was too late. Before I did something stupid or impulsive.
I grabbed for the doorknob but he blocked my exit.
I said, “Shane, I need to report—“
“I have to speak with you.”
I pushed on his big, broad chest. It didn’t budge. “Shane, I’m at work. You’re the boss. I’m the new girl. I’ll get fired. Besides—“
“No one will fire you.” He caught my wrists and gathered them into one fist.
A quiver of heat raced through me. Oh God, I loved it when he acted like this, domineering and in control. But at the same time I was torn, conflicted, and nervous. First, I had been telling myself I was better off without him since he’d walked out of my life that night. And I’d almost convinced myself that was true. And second, this was not the time or place to talk about our personal problems. What if someone found us? What excuse could I give my manager that wouldn’t get me into trouble?
I twisted my wrists, trying to free them from his vice-like grip. It wasn’t working. “That’s not the point, Shane.”
“Then let me say what I need to say,” he snapped, his voice uncharacteristically cold.