Seeing Daria’s meaningful gaze on me, I did my referee bit as well, adding, “And tonight’s video call is all about me, right?” As soon as the words came out, a wave of depression hit me, and my voice trailed off.
This call was about me because – frankly – I was at the end of my tether. It was terrifying, the way I couldn’t stop thinking about him, the way I couldn’t stop hurting with every second that Constantijin wasn’t next to me.
“Yanna.” Nik sounded sober.
I managed a smile. “Yeah?”
“The other thing I was telling you about---well, we can’t handle being kept as a secret. That’s why men make poor mistresses.” He grimaced. “You probably made him feel you were ashamed---”
“Ashamed of what? Him?” I pointed at the screen, which was still on Constantijin since it was an hour-long coverage on the show’s top picks for the sexiest men on the planet.
The TV showed a shot of him in a fashion event last winter. His golden copper-tinted hair was slightly longer than usual, with a rearview shot of Constantijin revealing how his curls brushed past his snowy-white scarf. His beautifully fit black trench coat made his shoulders appear even broader and was an exquisite contrast to the light pink shade of his shirt and gray pants.
He was unbelievably beautiful, and the fact that he had been mine – even briefly – made it hard for me to breathe.
“Yes, Yanna, he could have thought that. Kastein isn’t perfect – no one is. We all have our secrets. Flaws. Weaknesses – and you could be one of them.”
Chewing on my lip, I slowly asked, “Are you saying I should really gatecrash the fundraiser?”
Nik glanced at Daria and a smile immediately appeared on her face.
“Yuck,” Alyx muttered. “They’re communicating silently.”
Ignoring that, Daria told me, “Yanna, baby, this is one of those times you should be happy you have an arrogant billionaire as one of your friends.”
~~~
I’m not gatecrashing. I repeated the words in my mind over and over, but they weren’t enough to dispel the anxiety squeezing my chest as I stammered my name.
The man in a tux flipped a couple of pages. “Right. Ticket please?”
A couple of other guests walked past me as I took out the glossy piece of paper that had cost Nik two thousand dollars to purchase. I guess their face value was a lot higher than mine. Honestly, the admission price for Erik Kastein’s fundraiser astounded me. In fact, it made me want to back out, but Nik had gone on to buy it, saying that it was for a good cause anyway.
The security officer scanned my ticket before looking back at me with a respectful smile. “Thank you, Ms. Everleigh. Enjoy your night.”
He pressed a button that had the tinted glass doors sliding open. I stepped in and found myself in a strange glittering world. So this was how the rich and famous partied.
In my mind, fundraisers were colorless and boring, occasions where you weren’t supposed to show your teeth when you smiled. But this fundraiser – it was out of this world, or maybe the Kasteins just really knew how to throw a good party.
Constantijin’s father had booked an entire museum for his fundraiser and transformed it into some kind of black-and-white paradise. The walls were covered with black-and-white striped velvet while the floor sparkled like pearls. On one side, the black-glass buffet table was illuminated from below, making it seem as if the rows of cocktail dishes were floating on a sea of gold and onyx.
Everywhere around me were Kens and Barbies of all shapes and sizes. They could be size 1 to 10, but they still seemed perfect in a shiny, waxy kind of way – if I bumped into any one of them, I was afraid they’d shatter.
I started forward, craning my neck once in a while in hopes of catching a glimpse of a familiar head of gold and copper hair.
I’m not gatecrashing, I’m not gatecrashing, I’m not---
I accidentally tripped on the hem of my own gown – a strapless two-toned creation that Daria had shipped to me all the way from Athens – causing me to stumble into a waiter, who lost hold of his tray of champagne flutes. They crashed on the floor, and all eyes were suddenly on us.
Including the silvery gaze that had been haunting me in my dreams.
Constantijin stared at me. He was dressed all in white, which should have made him look utterly ridiculous, but no. He didn’t. He looked perfect. At that moment, I realized just how much I had missed him – still missed him. He turned my life upside down with just one glance, made me come alive with a single touch –
And when Constantijin turned away, he broke my heart all over again in a single instance.
A soundless gasp was torn out of me. People were snickering all around me, and the silent and insolent stares were even worse. I lifted a hand, searching sightlessly for something to hold on to, but I dropped it again when I realized that I would only be able to grasp air.
Someone suddenly took hold of my hand.
I looked up, and my lips parted in shock. This had to be the worst coincidence in my entire life. “Drake?”
A familiar wry smile touched his face. “Don’t sound too happy.”
My cheeks flushed red. God, what a bitch I was. Drake Morrison would have been quite a catch in any woman’s eyes. He even looked more gorgeous when he was dressed formally, and he still wasn’t doing anything to hide how much he, umm, enjoyed my company.
“Sorry, Drake. I didn’t mean…” With a sigh, I confessed, “You just have the best and worst timing, Drake.”
His smile turned into a grin. “Because Kastein keeps catching you in my company?”
My eyes widened. “How did you---” I paled. “Did I give myself away?”
He shook his head. “Relax, Yanna. Neither of you gave yourselves away. But I like you – a lot – and because of that, I see things more than other people do.”
“It’s not what you think.”
He raised a brow.
“Really. We’re not…we’re just dating.”
“Not exclusively?”
Thinking about the latest blond bombshell I had seen him on TV with, I answered slowly, “No.” Saying it out loud hurt, and it made me unconsciously search for Constantijin again, as if I really had to confirm the truth of what I was saying with my eyes. I needed to see him with another woman – in person. If I did, maybe I could finally give up on him.
It didn’t take more than a second to find Constantijin, as if fate was just waiting to give us a chance for our gazes to collide. He stood poised on another pair of glass doors that led into the museum’s conservatory.