Good.
“I’m the one he’s keeping a secret, Mr. Carson. He thinks you won’t approve of me.” Behind her, she felt Alan stiffening again, but she squeezed his hand harder, willing him to trust her. When Saffi looked back at Alan’s father, the look on his face told her he was busily weighing the pros and cons of what she had said.
Which could be worse---a fag for a son or a weirdo for a potential daughter-in-law?
When a hard glitter entered his eyes, Saffi knew Andrew had made his choice.
She might be the weirdest girl in their hometown, but she was also a senator’s daughter, one who could help him win his own bid in Congress.
“This could have all been avoided if you told me the truth, son,” Andrew said.
Saffi squeezed Alan’s hand again, silently begging him to play along.
Alan coughed out blood as he pushed himself up from the ground. Saffi immediately crawled to crouch behind him so she could assist him. “I…didn’t think you’d approve.”
“Of course I’d approve.” Andrew smiled at Saffi. “She’s a good girl, whatever garbage people have been saying about her all these years.” He frowned. “What are you doing here anyway?”
“It’s my first time to tour with him.” The lie slipped out of her easily enough.
Andrew’s face cleared. “Do your parents know about the two of you?”
She shook her head. “I didn’t want to tell them…I thought nothing would come out of it.”
Alan was finally up on a sitting position, but he still had to lean against her, his arm wrapped around his sides as if his ribs needed support. The silence that hung in the air became tense all of a sudden, and Saffi knew Andrew was waiting for another sign that they were indeed together.
She turned to Alan. “I’m glad you’re okay,” Saffi whispered.
His eyes widened.
She lowered her lips to his.
And it was how Staffan found them, breaking into a dead stop a short distance away when he caught sight of Saffi’s familiar figure.
Words from long ago played in his mind.
I’ve played you for a fool so many times I’ve lost count, darling. And you know what? You’ll let me do the same thing again. You’ll let other women do it again. Because you’re weak – weaker than any man I know.
And he f**king was – but never again.
This was the last goddamn straw, and it felt even worse than Chloe’s ultimate betrayal.
Ah, Saffi March.
Goddamn you to hell.
~~~
Alan remained quiet even though his father had long left, his arm still around her shoulders while she supported carefully with her arm around his waist. Saffi’s side was blazing with pain, but she knew that Alan was hurting even more. She did her best to help him up to his feet, biting her lip to keep from crying out when Alan leaned against her rather heavily as he strove for balance.
Without waiting for his permission she immediately called Bob to tell him that Alan wouldn’t be able to dance for tonight’s concert – and maybe for the rest of the week. When she finished the call, he said abruptly, “Let’s go back.”
When he turned around, obviously intending to head back to the concert venue, a part of her wanted to leave him. If they went back, it would mean seeing Staffan again. But in the end, she went along, knowing that Alan needed her right now. She could always cry heartbroken tears later.
“Are you okay?” she asked after a short while.
“You didn’t have to do that.”
The humiliation in his voice made Saffi’s eyes burn and she shook her head at him. “Of course I had to. I couldn’t just let him beat you up!” She bit her lip. “I could see that you had no intentions of fighting him.”
“I feel ashamed.” Alan made the admission in a low whisper. “All my life I had a feeling he knew about who I am and he was just waiting for me to give him proof…so he could kill me.”
The way Alan tonelessly uttered the words made her hug him. “Alan, you don’t need to let him hurt you like that. It’s not right.”
He let out a bitter laugh. “Sapphire, not everything that’s right in this world is going to happen. If it did, then Staffan would have loved you back---” He broke off at the way Saffi paled. Alan cursed. “Shit, I’m sorry. Don’t listen to me.”
She managed a smile. “It is true.”
“No, f**k, it’s not. I’m sorry. I’m just bitter that I’m letting fear run---ruin---my life.” Alan raked a hand through his hair. “I envy you, Sapphire.”
Her eyes widened. “What?”
He nodded. “What you did – what you’re doing now, just to be with Staffan – I’ll never be able to do it.”
Her head hung low. “I’m pretending to be a groupie, Alan. That’s nothing to be proud about.”
Alan snorted. “It’s more than that. You’re taking a risk for the man you love – the most awful and stupidest risk, I grant you that---”
His words got a smile out of her.
“---but I have to say it, babe, you’ve got balls. More so than most men I know.”
She giggled, and the sound startled her because a while ago she had felt her world had already ended. Tears pricked her eyes, but she blinked them away. Alan was right. She had taken a risk. And she would keep taking those risks as long as there was a hope of getting Staffan to love her back.
She squeezed his hand. “Alan, thanks for those words. I was…depressed a while ago but you made me see the brighter side of things.”
“That’s what g*y friends are for.”
They both laughed.
Alan sobered. “But Sapph? I did hear before that you were getting engaged…”
Saffi paled. “It’s not official, but I did say ‘yes’. If everyone thinks it’s a good idea…” She looked down. “I just want a chance to make back for what happened---”
“It wasn’t your fault!”
“It would have been better if I really was as crazy as everyone I thought I was back then. At least if I was crazy I wouldn’t have known how awful it was for my family when they saw that video--–then everyone was talking about me afterwards, and the controversies, the scandals that followed---I’m the reason my dad lost that time.”
“It was a cruel prank, but it wasn’t the truth,” Alan protested vehemently. “We were directly or indirectly cruel to you, and we are the ones to blame. We caused your dad to lose---”