Robbie engaged the autopilot and rushed toward me, pulling the jib sheet from my hands. He released the rope and pulled. The wind died down for a moment as he worked the sail. For that one minute in time, I thought we were going to beat the storm. The two of us together would come out victorious and we could use the storm to shoot us across the water like a canon.
Lightning flashed, and the wind suddenly puffed in a different direction, filling the sail and pulling Robbie like a marionette on a string. In the bright light of the flash, I watched his arm stretch violently straight and then continue to bend in the wrong direction. Even over the thunder I heard a popping noise. Robbie's eyes went wide, and he dropped the rope, falling to his knees. His scream echoed in my ears.
The sheet that was once in his hands was flapping in the wind like a whip, the sail out of control. I jumped across the deck, water dripping off my cap. My hands knew what to do before my brain did.
I needed to lose the jib. The sail was overpowering the boat, and I couldn't control it without Robbie. Even with Robbie, I would have taken it down. The storm was going to rip the boat apart if I didn't. I let out the sheets, and the jib flapped in the wind like a pennant. The air filled with its clatter, noisy even over the increasing growl of thunder.
I grabbed the sheet that was once Robbie's, and wrapped it around a winch. With more strength than I knew I possessed, I grunted and ground the winch until the jib was neatly rolled up and locked away. It no longer was catching the wind, but we were still moving at a breakneck pace. Now I regretted not having reefed the mainsail as it sped us dangerously along. There was no way to fix it, though.
Robbie struggled to his feet, his face a mask of pain as he cradled his crooked arm against his body. He was going into shock. He could do nothing to help me now. I tied the ropes in place, watching Robbie carefully pick his way down into the cabin. Fear lurched in my stomach, dread numbing the stinging rain on my skin. He disappeared below deck, and I forced myself to move. If I didn't move, we were going to die out here in the storm.
A wave washed over the deck, the water cold and dark. I had to make sure Robbie was secure and then I had to get us out of trouble. I didn't stop to let myself think. If I thought about what was happening, I would freeze. I would fail. For all intents and purposes, I was sailing single-handed now. In a storm. It was my nightmare come to life.
I left the autopilot engaged, praying that there was nothing to hit in the immediate future, detached my line, and ducked into the cabin. Robbie was curled up on his bunk, his face white as a sheet.
"Hey," I said, taking a lee cloth and gently starting to tie him in. The boat was rocking violently, and I didn't want him to fall out of his bunk and injure himself further.
"I put my arm back, but it doesn't look right," he whispered through clenched teeth. I could see his elbow already beginning to swell. I touched the hand on his injured arm, checking for a pulse. Luckily, his heartbeat throbbed madly into my fingertips.
I turned and opened up the cooler, grabbing a bag of ice and ransacking the kitchen for some painkillers. I fed him four brown pills and tucked the ice up under his elbow. The boat lurched, and I nearly lost my footing. As much as I wanted to stay with him, to make sure he was all right, I had to get back up and keep the boat upright and sailing.
"I'll be back in a little bit to check on you. Just rest. If you need me, holler." I kissed his forehead, unsure if the cold wet was just from the rain. I put on my foul-weather gear, the raincoat and pants making me feel warmer. I hadn't even realized I was cold. Robbie whimpered in his bunk. I knew the pain must be excruciating; I did the only thing I could do, tucking the blanket around him a little bit tighter, and went back up on deck.
The wind nearly bowled me over as I stepped up on deck. I hooked my tether to the ring in the cockpit and closed up the boat. Robbie was going to have a rough trip, but I needed to keep him dry. The thought of him going into shock terrified me, but I had no choice. I had to get us to safety.
I disengaged the autopilot, locking my hands onto the wheel. Spray flew across the deck, splattering cold wet drops across my face. Every wave washed over the boat until it seemed we were more underwater than sailing across it. I focused only on the wheel, guiding us through the storm by the tiny light of the navigation in the cockpit.
I had never seen so much lightning in my life. It was like I was surrounded by strobe lights, each one going off at complete random. Blue light danced between the clouds and purple light seared as it touched the black water. It was like sailing through a flickering haunted house.
The wind screamed through the rigging, drowning out even my own thoughts. I wished it would stop, but I knew I had to keep pushing forward. I screamed back at the sky, venting my fear and frustration in a wordless howl. Fear racked my body, and I clung to the steering wheel in a desperate attempt to keep Robbie and I from drowning.
There was no way we were going to make it. I couldn't sail this boat by myself through this storm. The winds were too powerful and I was too small. I had been forced into sailing alone and now, because of my inabilities, people I cared about were going to suffer. Because I couldn't handle being alone, Avery was going to lose an aunt. Grace was going to lose her sister. I was going to lose Robbie.
It was hopeless. There was no way I could do this.
The last time I had been in a storm like this, the coast guard had saved me. I had been in a tiny dinghy, and the storm had shook me like a rag doll. My mast had snapped in two from the wind, and I was going to drown. I remembered wondering what my parents were going to say at my funeral. Just when all hope seemed lost, and that the waves were going to overtake me, The Valiant had appeared. The boom of the coast guard ship, tall and strong, had been like an angel cutting down the walls of hell to save me. I wished for a moment that the beautiful ship could save me once again, and for a moment, I thought I saw it...
Lightning danced across the sky, blue and green and full of venom, but I could have sworn I saw the dark outline of the Valiant. I shook my head, trying to clear the water from my eyes. That wasn't possible. There was no way that ship would be here. I had to be hallucinating.
I closed my eyes, and when I opened them, the silhouette was gone. I almost felt more alone than I had before. Panic began to claw its way up my throat, and I wanted to scream and make Robbie come back out. But I knew he couldn't. I had to do this on my own. I looked out at the horizon where I thought I had seen the ship, desperate for it to come back.
The ship never reappeared, but I suddenly remembered something my dad used to say.