It wasn’t world peace, but it was some kind of happiness.
On the fourth floor, I walked back to my old rooms where I’d lived from the day we opened Club X. Three small rooms never meant to be a home, they’d served as a place for me to hide out from the world and all the pain that came with it. Then one night, Abbi walked into them and I didn’t want to hide anymore.
Gathering up my clothes, I looked down at the blanket on the floor and remembered the night I came back to find her still wearing my shirt and asleep in my bed. So small and innocent, she didn’t know it as she lay there all curled up but even then she’d found a way into my heart.
I cleaned out the last of the food in the refrigerator and threw it in the garbage, the final task to end my life there. I’d returned when Abbi went to Anna Maria Island because I couldn’t live in that house without her, but now if she’d have me, we’d go back to our home and begin a new life.
I wasn’t a fool. I knew no woman should want a man who’d done what I’d done, even if I could claim the best of intentions. Abbi had spent years with violent men. Would she see me as one of them now? If she did, I couldn’t blame her. I just had to show her I wasn’t like them.
Even now, my demons told me I had good reason for killing Mason. They always had good reasons for the bad I did. But now, I needed to work harder than ever to control the demons inside me. They may not ever push me to hurt Abbi, but I couldn’t continue to expect her to want to spend her life with me if I couldn’t control them.
In a choice between them and her, the decision was simple. Whatever I had to do to keep Abbi, that’s what I’d do.
I headed down to my car, ready to see her and show her I could be the man she needed and the man she wanted. Olivia caught me as I walked out the back door and looked like she had a secret she couldn’t wait to share.
“Hey, I wanted to talk to you, but you disappeared.”
“Just a small trip through the past. I’ve spent a lot of time in this club.”
Olivia’s smile grew bigger. “Well, it’s probably best that you won’t be doing this anymore. It’s not really the kind of job you should have now.”
“You’re probably right. After being arrested and the main suspect in a murder all in the past couple months, I probably need a break.”
“That’s not what I meant, actually. Gemma told me what Abbi thought was the flu was actually something else. Sickness women get in the morning.”
I stared down at Olivia, who stood there practically beaming, and tried to figure out her riddle. My thinking about what she’d said took too long for her, and she blurted out, “Morning sickness! Jeez, you men are so slow with this stuff.”
“Morning sickness? You mean—”
Olivia bounced on her toes, finally able to say the words she’d been holding in since she arrived at the club. “Abbi’s pregnant! Gemma says she’s worried you won’t be happy because of everything that’s happened.”
Abbi pregnant? I felt myself fall back against the wall, stunned at what Olivia had just told me. Abbi the mother of my child. Me a father. For a moment, all I could think was at least I had enough money because that’s all we had going for us, but then the truth pushed all the doubts out of my mind. We’d been through a lot together, but that didn’t mean we couldn’t do this.
We were having a baby.
“Are you okay, Kane? You look like you can barely stand up.”
I nodded, still getting a handle on the fact that I was going to be a father. “Yeah, I’m…I’m fine.”
“I’m so happy for you two. You’re finally able to go to her, so what are you doing wasting your time with me and an armful of food and clothes?”
Olivia’s words confused me, but looking down, I saw what she meant. “I was cleaning out my rooms. I better go. Should I bring her anything?” I asked, suddenly feeling like I didn’t know how to act.
“Get some flowers. Women love flowers. Other than that, all she wants to see is you. Now go!”
I quickly headed out to my car and threw everything in my arms out in the trash dumpster before racing over to the florist near the club for a dozen roses. I had one hour before I had to be ready to be a father, and I knew I better use that drive to figure out how to be the man Abbi needed now.
Alexandria’s house on Anna Maria Island was typical her—opulent in a way that didn’t seem off putting. Far wealthier than either of her sons or me, she wore her money like it belonged on her. Cash took after her in that way, unlike Stefan, who forever seemed to want to look like some frat boy, even after his life change because of Shay.
I walked up the stairs to the front door with my heart in my throat. Six long weeks was enough time for a woman to decide she didn’t want a man in her life who couldn’t control his demons. Six long weeks of not hearing a word from me, except for that one letter Jessup told me I could sneak to her. Six long weeks of every night alone. Six long weeks of worrying about me again.
What woman would want that?
“Hello, Kane.”
Alexandria opened the door for me to come in, speaking to me for one of the few times since we’d met all those years ago. I entered the house, instantly feeling like intruder as I always did when it came to Cash and Stefan’s mother.
“Hi, Alexandria.”
She silently led me down the hall to the foot of the stairs and turned to look at me as I stood there with the bouquet of roses in my hand. “Abbi’s feeling better. I’m sure she’ll be happy to see you after all this time.”
“Thank you for helping me with this. I know we’ve never been close and you likely agreed to let Abbi stay here because Cash asked, but thank you all the same.”
Alexandria looked up at me, staring into my eyes for so long that I wanted to look away, but finally she said, “I noticed when I saw you at Cassian and Olivia’s engagement party how much you look like your father.”
I’d only seen my father a handful of times in my life. How much I looked like him never entered my mind. I only knew I looked like Cash.
“You look more like him now because all that hatred and anger isn’t in your eyes anymore.”
“That’s all Abbi.”
Alexandria smiled. “I had a feeling. She’s a very sweet girl. Your father would like her.”
“I didn’t know him, so I wouldn’t know what he’d like,” I said quietly, trying to hide the resentment I still carried for Cassian March III.