“So did I.”
“You did?”
I nodded shyly, overwhelmed by the happiness shining brightly on his handsome face.
I debated about bringing our lack of sex up. So of course I plunged right to it. “Why haven’t you tried to make love to me yet, Gabriel? I know you want me, but you won’t touch me.”
A slight flush painted his high cheekbones. “Believe it or not, Emma, I’m actually trying to court you. I don’t want to rush into it because I don’t want you to ever feel I’m just using you for sex.”
“Is Embry right? Are you afraid of touching me?”
“I don’t know. I just know I want it to be right with us. I want it to be about love—not about getting off.”
I bit my lip. “You’re controlling me like this though. All I think about is how much you won’t touch me.”
Gabriel lowered his head. His body tensed. “Emma, it’s been hell on me. I’ve called myself the stupidest man alive every hour on the hour. I’ve never denied myself anything, and the one woman I want more than I’ve ever wanted anything in the world—I send her home without even a kiss.”
“You’ve suffered?”
“Yes!”
“Good. At least it wasn’t just me.”
Gabriel leaned closer and whispered, “I’ve made myself come every chance I get. The things I’ve done to you here,” he tapped the side of his head, “is criminal in at least ten states.”
I tightened my thighs. “I’ve worn my vibrator out over you.”
He flung his head back and groaned. “I’m so stupid, aren’t I? Why am I even trying to be a gentleman when it’s so clear that it’s making neither of us happy?”
I feathered my fingertips across his chin. “What if I can’t accept this? You? What will happen then?”
Gabriel’s smile fell. His gaze hardened. “Then I’ll do anything short of murder until you can.”
My breath escaped in a rush. What else could be said?
I stood on the precipice. Logic behind me, Gabriel beneath. I could stand up and throw him out of my apartment. I could go so far as to request police intervention if needed. From then, I could move on with my life as if Gabriel Gordon never existed.
I did it once. I could do it again.
I would be firmly in charge of my life, no wealthy master deigning to pull the strings on a whim. I would plow through my goals like always. Soon he would be another memory to add to my collection.
No Gabriel—no uncertainty.
No Gabriel—no confusion.
No Gabriel—no color.
“I always thought of you as an angel. Now I know you for the devil you are.”
I took one step and fell.
There’s no going back from here.
Leaning forward, I pressed my lips to his. Gabriel immediately opened. His tongue slipped inside, sensuously stroking my mouth with long strokes. I moaned raggedly, breathless and ravenous for him. Gabriel roughly pushed me back against the arm of the loveseat. I reached up and grabbed fistfuls of his hair.
This is what I wanted, had wanted even as I feared it and him.
I could never go back to a life without Gabriel.
His hands gripped my h*ps hard. Gabriel desperately ground against me. He broke our kiss to sink his teeth into my neck. The pressure made me scream in delight.
I moaned his name, lost and delirious from the feel of his muscled body against mine. My legs scrabbled around his hips, crossing up high around waist. He licked a trail from my neck down to my br**sts. He tongued them through my shirt, teasing me with what I couldn’t yet have.
“More!” I gasped.
Gabriel looked up at me, damp lips reddened and curled into a wicked grin. He ripped the shirt straight off my body. He immediately swooped back down, pulling my bra away so that my full br**sts could pop free. Plumping one breast, Gabriel didn’t tease me any further. He sucked my nipple hard. I arched up, desperately clinging to him as his lips, teeth, and tongue drove needy moans from my throat.
I fought his zipper. He swept my hand away and pulled it down himself. I palmed the long shaft, purring in hunger when it sprang free from the confines of his briefs.
“What are you doing to me, Emma?”
I silenced his pained question with an open-mouthed kiss. Gabriel pushed up my skirt and pushed my underwear out of the way. A deep groan reverberated in his chest when he slid two fingers all the way to the knuckle.
“You’re so soft and so, so wet.”
I tilted my h*ps and rocked madly against his hand. I wanted him to give me everything before I lost my mind.
“Gabriel, I want you. Now.” When still he hesitated, I held him tighter and begged hoarsely, “Please!”
He lunged forward. The broad head of his c*ck nudged at me. I urged him to go faster.
“I don’t want to hurt you, baby. I have to go slow because you’re so damned tight…”
I knew he might hurt me, but I didn’t care. Not anymore. Not about anything. “I want it all, Gabriel. Play with me however you want, just give me what I need.” I angled my h*ps and impaled myself. A strangled scream broke free. I clung to him as he pushed forward. “Oh, my God!” I moaned over how big he was, how I’d missed feeling him inside me all this time.
Gabriel crushed me to him, h*ps rocking faster and faster. Frenzy descended. We clawed our way closer to the other. His skin slapped against mine with erotic intensity. Gabriel branded himself deep within my core. I wasn’t going to last long. Pleasure pulses ricocheted through my body.
“I’m coming!”
He immediately slowed his thrusts.
“No! What are you doing?” I cried out in a panic.
“Playing with you just for a bit.” Gabriel kissed my ear before biting down on my lobe. “How badly do you want to come, baby?”
My fingers rhythmically clenched and unclenched. “Very badly.”
“Good. Then I want you to let go of me. That’s it. Arms up now. Good girl.” Gabriel crossed my wrists and then held both in one hand.
The vulnerability of my new position made me wetter. I blindly searched for his mouth, unconsciously seeking reassurance that he was still there with me. Gabriel responded immediately. His lips molded against mine as he murmured how much he loved and needed me. I tasted him fully and felt divine from the blessing.
“Do you like this, baby?”
“Yes!”
Gabriel’s craven smile made me groan. He worked his heavy shaft deeper and faster inside me. One of my legs dropped, toes digging into the carpet just so I could be completely open to him.
He held himself above me. I felt the heat of his stare as he studied every nuance of my expression. Each of my sighs, moans, and groans elicited a different response from his body.
I was completely in his power. I loved it. I craved more.
My orgasm built with each measured thrust. “Gabriel, I’m so close!”
A grimace appeared on his gorgeous face. His free hand lifted my h*ps higher. I immediately screamed as the tight, pleasure knot between my thighs unraveled.
Gabriel pounded into me harder than ever. Enamored with his carnal violence, I desperately kissed any part of him I could reach. Gabriel captured my mouth with his. Our tongues sensually tangled, softly and gently, in direct odds with our rough coupling.
All too soon he stiffened. “Emma!”
Aftershocks ripped through Gabriel and his h*ps pushed greedily against mine. He collapsed against me. I could feel his heart hammering against mine. After nuzzling my neck for several minutes, Gabriel released my wrists and dryly stated, “Well, that didn’t go as planned. I was trying to be a good boy for a little longer.”
“Are you complaining, Mr. Gordon?”
He immediately squeezed me to him. “Of course, not.”
My arms slid across his shoulders. I clung to him, unwilling to let even an inch separate us.
“Emma?” he whispered sweetly in my ear. “Where do we go from here?”
I held him tighter, flattened that I had no real idea. All I knew was that I loved Gabriel, I was mad for him, and I just couldn’t let him go.
“Wherever we go, we go together, Gabriel.”