He ground his h*ps into mine and leaned down to kiss my neck. I closed my eyes and angled my head, perfectly content. Kellan's attentions started waking my body up. I wrapped my legs around his, wondering just how quiet Kellan and I could be. Silent sex with him was difficult, but not impossible. As his lips wandered farther down my neck, I murmured, "Mmm . . . because you're a villainous boy who is only using me to satisfy his baser instincts."
Kellan pulled back from kissing me. "Is that really what your dad thinks of me?"
Caught off guard by his abrupt change of pace, I blinked and stammered, "Uh, I don't . . . no . . . I don't think so."
Kellan shifted to the side of me, and I twisted my body to face him. "Yeah, he does. He thinks all I want from you is sex, and that I have a different version of you in every city that I visit."
I pursed my lips, trying to think of some tiny falsehood in Kellan's assessment. Unfortunately, I was pretty sure that was the bulk of Dad's problem with Kellan. He just didn't trust him, not with his lifestyle. I shrugged. "I'm sure he doesn't think it's every city."
Kellan frowned, then hopped out of bed again. Sitting up, I let out an exasperated grunt. "Now what are you doing?"
Kellan walked over to his dresser and started stripping. My objection left my lips as his boxers hit the floor. Kellan watched me watching him with a smirk. Slipping on fresh underwear and jeans, he rummaged for a shirt as I blatantly stared. As enticing as his bare body was, there was something overly erotic about him standing there with his jeans unfastened. Especially with the intriguing lines of definition on his perfectly sculpted abdomen stretching and flexing as he moved. I really wanted that body lying on top of me again.
Amused by my intense inspection, Kellan found a shirt he liked and slipped it over his head. I smiled as that fabulous body was encased in deep red cotton. Even dressed, he was stunning. Zipping up his pants, Kellan shook his head as he walked over to me.
"You do know that if I stared at you the way you stare at me, I would get yelled at."
I gave him a light kiss when he leaned down to me. "I would never yell . . . but yes, I know." His face was a mixture of amusement and irritation when he pulled away. Giggling, I told him, "Life is full of unfairness." I frowned. "Like you leaving me right now. Where are you going?"
Kellan smiled as he ran his fingers through his hair, effortlessly arranging the longer layers into an irresistible mess of bed-head. "I'm going to go show your dad that there is more to me than he thinks. My only interest isn't sleeping with his daughter." He winked, then turned to leave. Hand on his doorknob, he twisted back. "Although, that really is what I would like to be doing right now." His eyes trailed down my body, igniting me. Kellan sighed as I squirmed under his scrutiny. Meeting my eyes, he added, "See the sacrifices I make for you?"
He smirked and left the room before I could comment.
I thought of joining Kellan and my father, but decided against it. Dad needed to get to know Kellan one-on-one if he was ever going to bond with him. And besides, I didn't want to distract Kellan with my sexy allure. Yeah, right, sexy. Smiling at my own ridiculousness, I hopped out of bed. Kellan was the alluring one in the relationship, which was a perk for me. I was . . . the lucky one.
I bumped into Mom in the hallway as I made my way to the bathroom. Kellan's place was a little on the small side. The upstairs only consisted of two modest bedrooms with a bathroom tucked in between them. Running into people in the hallway was almost unavoidable. It was how I'd first officially met Kellan.
Mom smiled as she listened to her husband having a civil conversation with mine. I gave her a brief hug as I listened as well. Dad was asking Kellan if he could really make any money off his band "thing." As Kellan started to explain that he would probably make out "okay," Mom focused her attention on me. "We should hit some wedding boutiques while I'm in town. Find you a dress before I head back home."
I cringed at the idea. "Mom, I really don't need a big production. I just want to keep it simple."
Mom swished her hand. "Even simple, you'll still need a dress."
I contained the sigh of defeat stirring in my lungs. I really couldn't argue with that. "Okay, sure thing."
Before she could comment further, I popped into the bathroom and quickly locked the door behind me. I just knew that ninety percent of my wedding would be mapped out before Mom left. Who knew she was so obsessed with weddings? We'd certainly never discussed it before this. It just hadn't really come up when I was with Denny.
Maybe Mom saw the connection between Kellan and I, and knew, just like I did, that I'd found the one. My soul. My better half. My reason for being. Nothing in this life would ever fill me with as much joy and peace as Kellan did. I really didn't know what I would do without him.
When I came out of the bathroom after my obscenely long shower, Kellan was back in our bedroom, but he'd changed into his track pants and he was lacing up his running shoes. My expression must have been an odd one, for he did a double take when he noticed me. Of course, that could have been because all I was wearing was a thin, white towel that barely covered my body. I really needed to do laundry.
An amused smile on his lips, he finished tying his shoes.
"What?" I asked, closing the door behind me.
Kellan shook his head, his grin growing. "Nothing." I started to again ask what was entertaining him so much, but he finished with his shoes and stood up. "I'm going to go for a quick run."
"All right." Wondering if my dad had been hard on him in my absence, I added, "Everything okay?"
His deep blue eyes drifted down my nearly nak*d body. I was instantly aware of the fact that I wasn't wearing any underwear. When his eyes returned to mine, there was a definite edge of heat in them. "Everything's fine. Just need to do a little maintenance." Switching his expression to a casual smile, he ran his hand up his shirt and patted his rock hard abs. Lucky hand. Walking over to me, he withdrew his hand from under his shirt, then reached down to pinch my butt. "Wouldn't want to get all flabby now that I'm married."
I giggled and batted his hand away when it started drifting up my towel. Slinking my arms around his neck, I let myself get a little lost in his physical perfection. "I'd rather have you flabby than gone."
Kellan held me close to him; he looked a little lost himself as he gazed at me. "I just need . . ." He paused for a second and then told me, "I need a little fresh air." He gave me a quick kiss and seemed perfectly at ease, but I swear he'd just altered what he was going to say to me. Or maybe I was just being paranoid. Our relationship hadn't always been the most honest one. But we'd sworn that we were going to hold nothing back from each other anymore, and I trusted him.
Nodding, I released him. His smile never faltered, but I thought the light in his eyes dimmed a little as he turned away from me. Opening my dresser, I watched Kellan as he started to open the door. He stopped before he did, though. Laying his head against the door jamb, he muttered, "Damn it, I can't do this."
Ignoring my clothes, I twisted to him. "Kellan?" Was I right just now? Had he lied to me?
Inhaling a deep breath, Kellan stared at me in silence for several long moments. The tension in the room tripled as each second ticked by. The cool air washed over my damp skin, chilling me, and each drop of water that fell from my hair felt like an icicle piercing my body. I started to shake as my nerves amplified the sensation.
Seeing my fear, Kellan took a step toward me. "You said complete and total honesty, right?"
I nodded, not able to talk yet. Kellan looked away. His mind was clearly spinning over some problem. I just didn't know what it was. Swallowing the lump in my throat, I managed to ask, "What is it?"
He looked back at me. "I'm sorry. I purposely misled you right now. I'm not leaving the house because I want to exercise, or because I want air. I need to do something . . . and I need to do it alone."
The ice settling over my skin instantly burst into flames; I swore I could hear the sizzle. "You . . . lied to me? About what? What exactly do you need to do alone?"
Kellan cringed and held his hands up. "See, I wanted to avoid this reaction, that's why I lied. But we're trying to do the honesty thing, so I changed my mind and decided to tell you the truth. So don't get mad."
So hot with anger that I felt like my hair was going to dry by itself in the next five seconds, I bit out, "But you haven't told me the truth. You haven't told me anything. You're being vague and mysterious . . . and I don't like that."
Kellan closed his eyes. "It would have been easier to just keep walking." I started tapping my foot, and Kellan slowly reopened his eyes. "Joey called while you were in the shower. I'm going to go meet with her, and I want you to stay here with your parents."
My jaw dropped. "No! I don't want you to meet her without me. I'm coming with you!"
Kellan shook his head. "I don't want you anywhere near her. I want you to stay here." His tone was firm, commanding. It really pissed me off.
"You're not the boss of me. If I want to go-" Sighing, Kellan turned away from me. I grabbed his elbow and swung him around to face me. "Hey, I wasn't done talking to you."
Mouth set in a firm line, Kellan retorted with, "I know I'm not the boss of you, Kiera. I got that loud and clear when Denny walked back into your life and you didn't say a word to me. But you're not the boss of me either, and if I want to do this on my own, then I will."
With that, he turned and left. And I let him.
Tears were stinging my eyes as I sat on the bed. Absolute honesty wasn't all it was cracked up to be.
I fumed for a long time after he left. My dad tried to make me feel better by telling me that maybe Kellan wasn't the right person for me. He stopped talking when my cold glare turned deadly. My mom was suspiciously quiet as she flipped through a wedding magazine; I had no idea where she got the magazine, but by the delight on her face as she scanned the pages, and her silence at my obvious displeasure, it was clear she was hoping Kellan and I would patch things up soon. And I wanted to. I didn't like being angry with him. I didn't like it when we snipped at each other.
I knew disagreements were inevitable, though. It was finding a way through the disagreements that made a relationship work, or broke it apart completely. Kellan and I had fought many times before, but it seemed like most of our fights were over the big stuff. We hadn't had the tiny spats. Not really. This was all sort of new for us, and I really didn't know how to handle it.
All I kept thinking about while he was gone was what he might say or do with Joey. Well, no, I didn't really think he'd do anything with her. He loved me, considered us married. He wouldn't break that for some floozy he'd had sex with years ago.
So was I scared over what he'd say? Well, no, I pretty much knew what he'd say. He'd call her names, tell her she was a huge mistake, and throw a wad of money at her, hoping to shut her up. I smiled at the image of him all ticked off. He was absurdly attractive when he was angry.
My tiny smile thawed my nerves. No, I wasn't worried or concerned about Kellan in all of this. It was the unknown element. It was Joey. I didn't know what she would do or say to him, and that made me anxious. And that's exactly the reason Kellan didn't want me to go. He did know her, used to live with her. He knew she had a fiery temperament. He was trying to protect me by meeting her alone, and I'd bitten his head off for it.
My anger faded as I considered Kellan's view of the situation. He must be embarrassed. Not for the tape, but for the way it was exposed-in front of my parents and me. He wanted Joey appeased so she'd move on. He must have known that bringing me along would only drag out the process, or possibly even halt it all together. Surely Joey would say or do something that would offend me, and I'd end up going off on the woman. Kellan was probably right about having me stay behind. If I were him, I think I would have wanted me to stay behind too.
When Kellan finally came home about an hour and a half later, my anger had vanished. Everyone looked over at Kellan when he entered the house. He inhaled a deep breath as he shut the door. He cast me nervous glances, not ever fully turning to look at me. His hair was dripping with sweat and his arms glistened. I figured he'd decided to go for a hard run after all. Maybe he'd needed it after dealing with that trollop.