“Alex, there was another daimon. You know that.”
Marcus’ voice carried over the sound of rushing blood that fil ed my ears.
“Yes, but… ” I remembered how freaked out I’d been.
Sobbing and hysterical, I’d shaken her and begged her to wake up, but she hadn’t moved.
And then I’d heard someone else outside.
Panicked, I’d barricaded myself into the room and grabbed the money. Things had been blurry then. I’d needed to run. It was what Mom had prepared me to do if something like that ever happened.
My heart stuttered and missed a beat. “She… she was stil alive? Oh—Oh, my gods. I left her.” I wanted to puke al over Marcus’s polished shoes. “I left her! I could’ve helped her! I could’ve done something!”
“No.” Aiden reached for me, but I backed away. “There was nothing you could do.”
“The other daimon did it?” I glared at Marcus, demanding an answer.
He nodded. “We assume so.”
I started to tremble. “No. Mom wouldn’t become… it’s impossible. You—you’re al wrong.”
“Alexandria, you know how it could have been done.”
Marcus was right. The energy the daimon passed on was tainted. She would’ve been addicted from the first moment on. It was a cruel way to turn a pure-blood, robbing them of al free wil .
I wanted to scream and cry, but I told myself I could handle this. The burning in my eyes told me I was a liar. I turned back to Marcus. “She’s… a daimon?”
Something akin to pain flickered across his otherwise stoic face. “Yes.”
I felt trapped in this room with virtual strangers. My eyes skittered across their faces. Lucian seemed bored with this, surprising considering his earlier outpouring of affection and support. Aiden looked like he was having a hard time keeping his expression blank. And Seth… wel , he was watching me expectedly. Waiting for me to break down into hysterics, I assumed.
He might get that. I was one step away from a ful -blown freak out.
Swal owing against the thick lump in my throat, I tried to slow the wild beating in my chest. “How do you know this?”
“She’s my sister. I would know if she were dead.”
“You could be wrong.” My whisper held a tiny shard of hope. Dead was better than the alternative. There was no coming back once a pure turned into a daimon. No amount of power or begging—not even the gods could fix it.
Marcus shook his head. “She was spotted in Georgia.
Right before we found you.”
I could tel this hurt him—possibly as much as it hurt me.
She’d been his sister after al . Marcus wasn’t as emotionless as he made himself out to be.
Then the Apol yon spoke. “You said her mother was seen in Georgia. Was not Alexandria in Georgia when you found her?” His voice was oddly accented, almost musical in quality.
I slowly turned to him.
“Yes.” Aiden’s dark brows furrowed.
Seth appeared to consider that. “Does it not strike anyone as odd? Could it be her mother remembered her?
Was actual y fol owing her?”
A strange look crossed Marcus’s face. “We’re aware of the possibility.”
It didn’t make sense. When pures were turned, they didn’t care about things from their previous lives. Or, at least, that was what we believed. Then again, it wasn’t like anyone took the time to question a daimon. They were kil ed on sight. No questions asked.
“You believe her mother is aware of her. Possibly even looking for her?” Seth asked.
“There’s a chance, but we cannot be sure. It could have been a coincidence that she was in Georgia.” Marcus’s words rang false.
“A coincidence that she was in Georgia in addition to the two other daimons fol owing her?” Aiden asked. Marcus’s scowl deepened, but Aiden continued, “You know how I feel about this. We don’t know how much of their previous lives daimons retain. There’s a chance she’s looking for Alex.”
The room tilted, and I squeezed my eyes shut. Looking for me? Not as my mother, but as a daimon. For what? The possibilities startled me… sickened me.
“It is al the more reason to remove her from the Covenant, St. Delphi. Under my care, Alexandria wil be protected by Council Guards and the Apol yon. If Rachel e is hunting her then she wil be safest with me.”
When I opened my eyes, I realized I was standing in the middle of the room. Each breath I took hurt. The need to give in to the tears was there, but I forced it down, al the way down. I lifted my chin and looked Marcus straight in the eye. “Do you know where she is now?”
Marcus raised his eyebrows as he turned to Lucian, who took a moment before he responded. “I have a dozen of my best Sentinels hunting for her.”
I nodded. “And you al —al of you think that knowing that my mother… is a daimon wil get in the way of me being an effective Sentinel?”
There was a pause. “Not al of us agree, but yes.”
“I can’t be the first person to face that.”
“Of course not,” said Marcus, “but you are young, Alexandria, and you… ”
My breath got caught in my throat again. “I’m what?”
Il ogical? Distraught? Pissed off? Those were a few things I was feeling right now.
He shook his head. “Things are different for you, Alexandria.”
“No. They’re not.” My voice rasped. “I’m a half-blood. My duty is to kil daimons no matter what. This won’t affect me.
My mom—she’s dead to me.”
Marcus stared at me. “Alexandria… ”
“Wil you force her from the Covenant, Minister?” Seth asked.
“We wil not force her to leave.” Marcus interjected, his eyes on me.
Lucian swung toward Marcus. “We agreed on this, Marcus.” His strained voice was low. “She needs to be placed under my care.”
I knew he was saying a hel of a lot more. I watched Marcus consider whatever that unspoken thing was.
“She can remain at the Covenant.” Marcus kept his gaze steady. “Nothing wil be jeopardized if she stays here. We can discuss more of this later, don’t you agree?”
My eyes widened as I watched the Minister submit to Marcus. “Yes. We wil discuss this in great detail.”
Marcus nodded before turning to me. “The original deal stil holds, Alexandria. You wil have to prove to me you are ready to attend in the fal .”
I let out the breath I’d been holding. “Is there anything else?”
“No.” I turned to leave but Marcus stopped me.
“Alexandria… I’m sorry for what has happened. Your mother… didn’t deserve this. Neither do you.”
A sincere apology, but it meant nothing to me. I was numb inside, and I wanted nothing more than to be away from al of them. I left the office with my head high, not seeing anyone. I even made it past the Guards, who’d probably heard everything.
“Alex, hold up.”
Struggling to control the cyclone of emotions building in me, I whirled around. Aiden had fol owed me out. I warned him off with a shaky hand. “Don’t.”
He flinched back. “Alex, let me explain.”
Over his shoulder, I saw we weren’t alone. The Guards stood by the closed doors to Marcus’s office—and so did the Apol yon. He watched us with casual indifference.
I forced my voice low. “You knew this entire time, didn’t you? You knew what’d real y happened to my mother.”
The muscle in his jaw ticked. “Yes. I knew.”
Hurt exploded in my chest. Part of me had hoped he hadn’t known, that he hadn’t kept this from me. I took a step forward. “We’ve spent every day together and never once did it cross your mind to tel me? Did you think I didn’t have a right to know the truth?”
“Of course I thought you had the right, but it wasn’t in your best interest. It stil isn’t. How can you focus on training—
focus on preparing to kil daimons—when you know your mother’s one of them?”
I opened my mouth, but nothing came out. How could I focus now?
“I’m sorry you had to find out this way, but I don’t regret keeping it from you. We could’ve found her and disposed of the problem without you knowing any different. That was the plan.”
“That was the plan? To kil her before I found out she was alive?” My voice grew louder with each word. “You preach to me about trusting you? How in the hell can I trust you now?”
Those words struck home. He took a step back, running a hand through his hair. “How does knowing what your mother is make you feel? What does it make you think?”
Hot tears burned in the back of my throat. I was going to break right here in front of him. I started backing up.
“Please. Just leave me alone. Leave me alone.”
This time, when I turned away, no one stopped me.
***
In a daze, I climbed into my bed. A sickening feeling settled over me. Part of me wanted to believe everyone was mistaken and Mom wasn’t a daimon.
My stomach churned and I curled into myself. Mom was out there, somewhere, and she was kil ing people. From the moment she’d turned, the need to feed on aether would’ve consumed her. Nothing else would matter to her.
Even if she did remember me it wouldn’t be in the same way.
I scrambled from the bed, barely reaching the bathroom in time. I fel to my knees, clutched the sides of the toilet, and gagged until my body shook. When I was done, I had no strength to stand.
My thoughts whirled into a heady mess. My mother’s a daimon. Sentinels were out there, hunting her down. But I couldn’t replace her warm smile with that of a daimon’s.
She was my mother.
I pushed away from the toilet and rested my head against my knees. At some point, there was a knock at the door, but I ignored the sound. There was no one I wanted to see, no one I wanted to talk to. I don’t know how long I stayed there. It could’ve been minutes—or hours. I wil ed myself not to think and to just breathe. The breathing part was easy, but the not thinking part was impossible. Eventual y, I crawled to my feet and stared at my reflection.
Mom stared back at me—al except the eyes, the only thing we didn’t share. But now… now she’d have those gaping sockets and her mouth would be ful of jagged teeth.
And if she did see me again, she wouldn’t smile or hug me. She wouldn’t brush my hair back like she used to.
There would be no tears of happiness. She might not even know my name.
She would try to kil me.
And I would try to kil her.
CHAPTER 12
BY SUNDAY EVENING, I COULDN’T HIDE IN MY
ROOM anymore. Sick of thinking, sick of being alone, and sick of myself. Somewhere over the past day, my appetite had returned and I was starving.
I managed to make it over to the cafeteria before it closed its doors. Thankful y, it was empty and I was able to eat three slices of cold pizza in peace. The food settled in a dense bal in my stomach, but I managed to get a fourth slice down.