“Are you freaking telling me that the guy leaves you out by the lake, passed out, and then just tells you sorry but he had to go?” Cam asked with murder in his voice.
“I was young, stupid, and didn’t care about him enough to even question what he said.”
“So was that the last time you saw him?”
Shame filled her eyes when she looked at him again. And silence accompanied his question.
“Grace, did you see him again?” Cam growled.
“Yes, I saw him again,” she finally answered.
“You still dated him after that?” Cam was incredulous.
“No. It was definitely over after that,” she told him.
“Then when did you next see him?” Cam was frustrated with how much he needed to push her to get any information from her.
“We moved to Billings, and a couple years later I was finding a small measure of peace, and we met up again,” she admitted. “I’d prefer not to go into that right now,” she told him, shame filling her at what she’d allowed Jimmy to do to her.
“For me to help you, you have to tell me everything,” Cam told her.
“Please, Cam. I can only give so much right now,” she said.
“Continue with what you’re willing to talk about, then,” he told her gently.
She continued speaking before she wouldn’t be able to. “One day when I came home from work early, I heard strange noises upstairs. I opened my mother’s bedroom door, because no one was supposed to be home. I found her and Jimmy together, and neither of them looked like they were having a bad time.”
Cam was stunned speechless. “Your mother and your ex were having sex?” he gasped. “What in the hell . . .”
“Oh, yeah, they were having sex—pretty wild sex, from the sound of it. I couldn’t move. I was telling myself to shut the door, to turn around and walk out. But for some reason I couldn’t do it. My mother was screaming—not in pain, mind you—and then Jimmy, well, Jimmy must have found his happy moment,” she said, her voice suddenly void of emotion. “I must have made a sound because they both turned toward the door and saw me. Jimmy looked so damn cocky, which is what I would expect of him,” she said. “But my mother, my darling mother—I’ll never forget the look on her face. It was . . . triumph. I never asked her about that look, that verification of how much she despised me. I finally managed to get my feet to move, and I calmly shut the door and walked to my room. Within minutes, I packed a bag of clothes and a few other items I didn’t want to leave behind and then I walked away from the house. I never went back.”
“Did you ever talk to him again? Have you and your mother reconciled?”
“Jimmy tried calling me for the next month. He finally gave up. I didn’t speak to my mother for three years. Finally, for the sake of my father, I came home. He never knew. I didn’t tell him and neither did my mother, of course. Our relationship was forever altered that day. We now talk once in a while, but it will never be more than obligatory meetings. I decided it was best if we came to a mutual understanding. We’re more like acquaintances than anything else. I’m a party planner, and she has a lot of contacts, so she’ll send business my way. I walk in the door, she gives me air kisses. We’re stiff and formal, but so are a lot of other families.”
“I don’t know how you could even look her in the face after that,” Cam said. He was completely blown away. What in the world was wrong with her family?
“I was never in love with Jimmy. It’s just . . .” She stopped herself from whatever she’d been about to say. “Never mind. It’s not even worth talking about. The bottom line is that I climbed in my car that day and drove to New York. It took me several days, but when I arrived, I thought at first that it was the greatest place on earth.”
“But that didn’t last, either?”
“No. After a few months I was extremely homesick. But the problem was that I didn’t really have a home. I couldn’t move back in with my parents. My only true friend was off in college, and I didn’t feel like there was anywhere I belonged.”
“Grace, I’m so sorry you ever felt that way.”
“It doesn’t matter. I went to college, got a degree in hospitality, and then started my event-planning business. But I realized after a few years that New York was just too much for me. So I came back home to Montana, but I decided to settle here in Sterling rather than in Billings.”
He waited, but she was quiet for several moments. “Did you meet anyone of importance in New York?”
“I had one semi-long-term relationship in New York, with Vince. The sex was good—your standard hot Italian lover, you know—but there was no emotion,” she said with another laugh.
Her comment stung more than Cam would ever admit. No, he hadn’t been a saint since they had parted ten years ago, and yes, he’d had other relationships, but none had worked out. How could they when his heart wasn’t his to give to another?
Cam didn’t know why, but for some reason he had pictured Grace back in Sterling waiting for when he was done with his degree. He’d wronged her in the way he’d left, but he would never forget that summer that had broken him apart.
“Your New York guy is still a lead. I need his information.”
“Really? I haven’t heard a word from him since I left New York. What would he matter?”
“If you dated him, he’s a suspect, Grace.”
“There’s not much to tell. He was from a wealthy family, but he was trying to be an artist, all living free and stuff. We shared a tiny loft, and after a while I realized he was perfectly content to live off either his daddy’s money or mine, and I grew tired of it. He didn’t even fight me when I left. He cheated on me, of course. But it was just something I expected at that point in my life. And I didn’t have enough emotion left in me to care. He was the last relationship I’ve been in.”