My heart plummeted and I felt sick. He wouldn’t. Would he?
Oh, God. I can’t see this.
Before I could turn and run, the door opened, and I was face to face with a gorgeous brunette. Judging from the long Harvard t-shirt and coffee cup she was carrying, it’s was no secret she’d been there all night. The image of her with Logan in his bed made me want rip out her throat, and wipe that charming grin right off her face. He told me I was the only one he’d ever taken into his bed, and now he was bringing bar trash home.
“I’m sorry, I must have the wrong house. Sorry to bother you,” I blabbered, slowly backing away from the door. It was the best thing I could come up with. Lame yes, but I hoped it would get me out of there faster so I can go back to my hole and die. If I stayed any longer, Logan might see me. Seeing the two of them together would only confirm the awful picture I had swimming in my head.
“Are you Clare?” she asked.
Why would the bar trash know my name?
“Um, yes. And you are?” I asked, rudely.
“Oh God! What you must be thinking! I’m so sorry! I’m Melanie,” she said brightly.
“Logan’s ex-wife Melanie?” I was not impressed. Her introduction was so not helping.
“Yes. Oh! And I’m here with my husband. With whom I’m expecting a child....and love very much!” she exclaimed, resting her hand on her belly. Now that I looked beyond her face, and was not willing her to die, I noticed the swell of her stomach.
“Sorry. Should have included that part in the beginning,” she added.
“Come on, why don’t you join me for some coffee? It’s decaf, but if you close your eyes and pretend, you can almost taste the caffeine,” she winked before leading the way inside.
“Is he here?” I asked quietly, following her to the kitchen.
“No, Colin came by about an hour ago and picked him up. Something about sobering him up and then kicking his ass,” she answered as she moved about the kitchen, grabbing another mug of hot coffee and handing it to me.
“Logan didn’t tell me you were coming to visit,” I said, making myself comfortable at the counter, unsure how to continue this awkward conversation.
“Oh, he didn’t know. Colin called us. He said something was wrong with Logan and he didn’t know what to do. He thought Logan was about to do something stupid. So we can down to intervene.”
Uh, okay.
“No offense, but when was the last time you even spoke to Logan,” I asked, knowing I was being kind of rude.
“No offense taken. And it’s been awhile. But he needed help, and I will always be here for him. Whether he wants it or not.”
Like Colin said, sometimes Logan needed a kick in the ass.
“He and I were completely wrong for each other. I was in love a man who didn’t love me, and Logan was in love with the idea of love. It was doomed from the start. But the man I saw last night, he was a wreck. And the only thing that can cause that type of agony is love.”
“Then why did he do it? Why did he leave me?” I asked bitterly, the hours spent in tears weighing heavily on my mind.
“That’s something only he can tell you.”
“Did you really love him?” I asked, unsure why I was asking, but this woman had once loved Logan and I guess I felt we had some weird kinship. God knows I wasn’t going talk about how great Logan was in the sack.
“Yes, as much as I could. How much can you love someone who doesn’t love you?” she replied.
“You knew?”
“Yes,” she admitted.
Shocked, I asked “Then why...?”
“Did I marry him?’
I nodded, waiting for her to continue.
“I was young and he was my first love. In my mind, I thought I could make him love me. That, eventually, over time, the love would grow. But it doesn’t work that way. Love can’t be forced.”
“And then came Gabe,” I guessed.
“Yes.” she said with a wistful smile. “I had a crush on him in school, but he’d always been seeing someone else. When he moved to New York and asked me to help with his practice, I gladly said yes. It was innocent at first, but eventually we gave in, letting our passion take over.”
She shook her head, her face lined with regret. “It was so wrong, what we did to Logan,” she said quietly.
“He doesn’t blame you, Melanie,” I said reassuringly.
“It still doesn’t make it right. I took a vow. I made a promise.”
“And now you can ask for forgiveness,” I told her, joining our hands, as a tear trickled down her cheek.
“I don’t deserve it,” she whispered, as her tears fell.
“You have it,” Logan’s voice said softly, causing my heart to flutter as he stood at the entrance of the kitchen. Another man, Gabe I guessed, trailed behind. Logan’s hair was a disheveled mess, and he had dark bags under his eyes. But he was most beautiful sight I had ever seen.
His eyes briefly connected with mine before walking to Melanie to pull her into a tight hug.
“You have nothing to apologize for, we both made mistakes,” he assured her, as she sobbed in his arms. They stayed like that for some time, and I let them have their moment. They both needed to heal and move on.
Eventually Melanie pulled away to wipe the tears from her eyes and looked up at Logan.
“You’re a good man, Logan. You deserve happiness,” she said.
Kissing him on the cheek, she turned to me, gave me a quick hug and then walked out with her husband, giving us privacy.
With his back still turned, he said, “She told you.” It wasn’t a question.
“No, she didn’t. She didn’t have to. You did,” I said.
He turned, confusion scattered all over his worn face as I held up the test results to him.
Understanding quickly set in, and he nodded, saying, “My jacket.”
I set the test results down on the counter and said, “Although, I don’t understand half of the stuff on this paper. Are you sick?”
Time seemed to go by slowly as I waited for his answer.
“I have cancer,” he finally said.
“No....no,” I wailed in disbelief.
Deja vu hit me hard, and I was suddenly in two different places at once, reliving the moment when Ethan told me the same exact thing. It couldn’t possibly happen twice.
It can’t be true.
Violently shaking my head in disbelief, I said, “But you’re so healthy. Maybe there’s some sort of mistake. We should call the hospital. Make them run the tests again.”